Santa Clause: Secret Fool- Bernard Love story
by LRmember
Summary: Kira is the elf who delivers supplies to all the departments. One day she finds Bernard sick in his office and decides to send him secret appreciation cards with Santa's help. But when Santa suddenly asks her to help Bernard find the sender of the cards she's stuck between Santa's orders and the secret she keeps.
1. Unnoticed

Nobody noticed me.

Ever.

And they weren't supposed to.  
I was the resupply elf in Santa's workshop.

Hardly anyone thought of my existence.

Santa knew, of course, and so did a few of the maintenance people and the janitors, but no one pays attention to the little girl elf, hiding behind boxes of supplies. I would scuttle about, shorter than usual for an elf my age and refill the boxes of hair and wood and ribbon and whatever else they needed. Once in a while someone would look up, eyes following the tiny black haired, turquoise-eyed elf, thinking how odd it was for them never to have seen me before.

But I knew everyone.

I knew how Daren had a crush on Judy and how Elli was sending secret love notes to Roy and how he wanted it to be Chloe. I knew how Tina would clean up shop even though she worked overtime and had to go home to Bryan, her husband. I knew how Leo flirted with Sarah because he wanted to see if she would go out with his friend and he accidentally made her fall for him. I knew how Glen would feed the Reindeer a candy cane after training when Kyle was strict with them. I knew how Kyle would secretly watch Glen because he had a crush on her and he liked how she treated the reindeer.

I knew how people would smiled whenever they saw a fresh vase of ice roses, some whispering they wish they know who did it and girls giggling like they were thinking the flowers were for them.

It was on a morning like this. Where the snow fell heavily, the end of the real winter season and the lighter cold started. The end of January and the time where elves slacked off for Parties and dances, and the time when I started to really pay attention.

"All right everybody, announcement." came the call of the head elf, Bernard. He always wore a big poufy hat on his head and a baggy zigzag shirt. "I know Christmas is still very far away and Valentines Day is in a few weeks but I want everyone working as hard as they can. We don't want a single good child left without a present and working hard now means less work later in the week when you'll all want to be begging to go to the cupid dance." He gave a deliberate glance at two elves who started giggling incoherently. "So make sure to work your hardest today or else no one will be going to the Valentines Day dance cupids throw." They applauded, and so did I, but I couldn't stop staring at his happy smile. Despite all his angry tones and the way he would scold elves until they cried I could see he was really worried.

I'd always liked watching Bernard the most.

In the mornings, while only a few elves were here, I brought in all the supplies to keep stocking. I could see Bernard sneakily put a vase of ice roses in the middle of the room. He would go through the mail and place letters and little presents of encouragement supposedly from Santa. And if someone were sick he would make sure to pick up his or her slack and though he was cold and seemingly mean there was always a reason behind his anger. Like when Frank the candy cane maker was worried because his daughter was sick Bernard realized his worry and pretended that Frank couldn't work because he could contaminate the candy canes when really he wanted Frank to be with his family.

And Bernard never called in sick. He would come in looking like a blizzard destroyed his house and still work as hard as ever.

It was during this time I found him sick in his office.

Finding him during his break taking a nap on the couch in his office, dreadlocks in his face as he curled up under a thick blanket, the sign he barely used taped to his door telling elves he didn't want to be disturbed. I hadn't meant to barge in; Santa had caught me and asked me to take Bernard some of Judy's famous hot cocoa because he hadn't been feeling well. When I walked in he was mumbling to himself about needing to work.

That's when I decided to send him the cards.

When I found Bernard sick in his office I realized how under appreciated he was. I brushed his hair out of his face and forced him to wake up long enough out of his delusion to at least take a sip of the cocoa when he looked up at me.

"Don't waste time on me. Go back to work. We can't let a single good kid go without a present." When he tried to get up he immediately fell back on the couch.

"You can't get up. You're sick." I said and he looked at me with such anger it was scary.

"Being sick is hardly something worth losing time on." He said and looked me straight in the eye. "I can't waste any more time." He downed the rest of the hot cocoa and got up and started to work.

"You don't have to-" I started but I couldn't finish. He fell asleep again so I just left, closing the door softly behind me.

"He still in there?" asked one of the other elves.

"Um . . ." I glanced at the door then shook my head. Other elves never spoke to me. "I-"

"What's your name?" the elf asked me. Jerry. That was his name. He was currently dating Sonya and trying to date Marsha at the same time. One of the few elves who wasn't the Christmas type. I'm not even sure how he got hired.

"Me?" I asked pointing stupidly at myself.

"Yes you. Who are you? And what were you doing in Bernard's office?"

"Santa . . . Santa asked me to bring him some cocoa. He . . . he wasn't in. Making rounds probably." I said airily. He stared at me for a moment longer and I tried to look inconspicuous.

"What's your name?"

"Kira. My name is Kira." I said looking away.

"That's a cute name." He said and pushed my black hair out of my turquoise eyes.

"Excuse me, Jerry." Bernard said. He looked flushed but steady. "Did you need something?" he asked curtly and Jerry frowned.

"I thought you weren't in." he said coldly glancing at me. I avoided his gaze, ears flushed.

"I was getting something from the back room." He replied in just as harsh a tone. "Do you have something for me?"

"Yes." He handed over a file. "That's the quota for the toys made today. It's nearly double yesterday." Bernard nodded as he took the files and clutched the doorframe for dear life. "You okay there, Bernard?" Jerry asked and he glared.

"Don't waste time pretending to be sympathizing. Get back to work, both of you." He gave me a stern look and I scuttled off, looking back to see him disappear back into his office.

The next day I decided to do it.

I wanted to help him smile more. But I needed Santa's help.

So here I was.

Sitting outside of the big mans office with a card in my hand.

_Is this really the right choice?_ I wondered when there was a cheerful creak as the door swung open.

"Ho-Ho-ho! Kira! Are you feeling well?" the big man asked and I nodded, mute. "Don't be nervous. Come on in! Sit down." I meandered into the room behind Santa to see Mrs. Claus smiling and holding a batch of cookies.

"Good . . . good morning sir." He looked at me curiously.

"Kira, I see you every day and you keep calling me sir. Couldn't you call me Santa like the other elves?" he said smiling and taking a bite of one of Mrs. Claus' cookies. She offered me one and I took it awkwardly.

"I'll-I'll try . . . Santa." I looked around nervously and started to shuffle my feet.

"What's this about, Kira?" he asked sinking into his big chair behind a huge desk.

"I-um . . . well . . . that is . . ."

"Don't be nervous dear." Mrs. Claus said smiling. She was really pretty, the kind of woman who radiated motherly warmth.

"I just . . . I-I wanted to send Ber-Bernard a c-card." I said shaking from my nervousness. I tried to hold up the card I wanted to give him but fumbled with it and it fell to the ground.

"Ho-ho?" Santa said and winked at Mrs. Claus, "Looks like Bernard will be getting a few cards this year." He said happily and started to laugh in his usual 'ho-ho-ho'.

"N-no! Not-not _that_ kind of card!" I stuttered and he stopped laughing to look at me.

"There's another kind?" he asked curiously.

"Well . . . I just . . . I thought he looked down so . . . I wanted to send him these . . . secretly." I added and picked up the card, struggling to hand it to Santa.

"Oh? Encouragement letters?" he asked reading the message.

"Y-yes. I . . . um . . . He's under appreciated and gets so many nasty cards I thought he might like to get a good one." I mumbled and Santa smiled.

"And you want me to deliver them why?"

"I know we all think Bernard works hard, but we assume that . . . that he knows already. That he doesn't need to be told. So I want this not to be from any-elf. I was wondering if you would-would mind giving him these. I'll put them in other elves bins to give to you and that way it will always be a different elf giving you the cards. In case he gets curious." I explained my plan, getting more and more confidant as I spoke. Santa nodded, rubbing his beard.

"And you only want to send these to Bernard?" he asked looking at me with curiosity.

"I-I know it sounds silly, but Bernard gives cards to everyone else. He's the only one left out." I muttered and Santa started laughing loudly. It wasn't the degrading laughter that belittled you, it was the cheerful friendly laughter that was contagious.

"Tell me Kira. Do you ever get cards?" I blushed and stared.

"Are you going to help me?

"Of course I'll help you, Kira. Now run along before Bernard catches you and gives you a scolding." He smiled and I sighed relieved.

"Thanks . . . Santa." I smiled and went about my chores.

An hour later I took my break, a short ten-minute break, when I over heard Santa calling Bernard to his office. I really don't mean to spy on people. I just get curious really. So here I was, wasting my break to spy on Santa and the head elf. I peaked through the crack in the door, a few elves hurried past me but didn't spare me a second glance.

"Who sent it!" came the shout from inside. I peaked through the crack again and there was Bernard waving the card in Santa's face. He was flushed and his ear tips were pink. Santa pursed his lips, looking mildly disappointed at the head elf but simply shook his head.

"They asked me not to tell you, Berno." He said coldly. He was careful to avoid saying if it was a boy or girl.

"Why? Santa! This is ridiculous! Elves shouldn't waste their time writing . . . silly little cards!" he scoffed to which Santa proceeded to give a small slow smile.

"But the reason you got that card is because the elf that sent it to you saw how you send the same notes to others." Bernard's eyes widened and he looked away, ears pinker than before. "Or did you forget about that?" Santa smirked, wily.

"But Scott this is just-"

"Bernard!" he said coldly. "Try to find out if you must. But they're much to clever for you to really find them." Santa said, and I was a little stunned by Bernard's audacity to call him Scott.

"Scott!"

"Bernard!" Santa imitated and started working through his papers, "Perhaps you would best spend your time doing what you love to yell at others for: work. Especially with the Valentine's Day ball coming up. We don't want to fall behind." Santa started to shoe away Bernard when he stopped before the door. I was prepared to run but sensed there was more for me to hear.

"Calvin." Bernard said formally, "You know I wont fall for the same trick as last year."

"Don't worry Berno. I wont try that again." Calvin said then glanced at the door. "Kira! Would you come in here please?" Scott called and I jumped unsure of what to do. "It's okay, come on in." I opened the door slowly to see Bernard turn to look at me uneasily.

"How long-"

"Sorry, I just . . . I heard yelling." I muttered, trying to think of an excuse.

"It's fine. Bernard here is just investigating something." Bernard swung to glare at Santa but he nodded at Bernard. I pretended not to know what they were talking about to avoid from giving away my position.

"Santa . . ." Bernard glared and Scott.

"Oh hush Berno. You can trust Kira." Santa smiled again. "As I suspect you heard, Berno here has gotten a card. Now he's pretty confused about this and I think he plans on finding the person or persons who sent it to him."

"Um . . . Good luck, sir." I muttered. I ruffled my hair to hide my turquoise eyes and shifted uncomfortably.

"I want you to help him find whoever sent this card." Santa smiled and I looked up, probably looking like a reindeer caught in headlights.

"Wh-what? No! No I couldn't . . . that's none of my business. Please don't-"

"Well why not?" Bernard said unexpectedly and I turned to him, terrified. "Why would it be such a bad idea for you to help me? I have a lot of work to do and having second person working on this with me would help."

"Why does it even matter?" I tried desperately, "Does it really matter who sent you a card? " I asked, attempting to sound nonchalant. Bernard thought it over for a moment then looked at my face.

"Why do you ask?" he glared, sounding furious.

"I-I-I just . . . I'm sorry . . . what-what do you want me . . . to do?" I whispered and he grimaced.

"First you should get back to work. You're the restocking girl aren't you? I'll tell you tomorrow what I want you to do about the card." He started to leave and held the door open for me. "Aren't you coming?"

"Um . . . I had to talk with Santa about something." I whispered and he nodded.

"Make it quick, we don't want to fall behind." As he left I rounded on the big man.

"What in the Frostbite do you think you're doing?" I hissed and Scott shook his head.

"Kira, it's unlike you to swear."

"It's only a half swear word. What were you thinking? I can't help him hunt ME down!" I hissed.

"Come on, it'll be fun! You can always point him away from yourself."

"You mean lie?"

"No! You could tell him who gives me the notes each day, but not where they get them."  
"So lie by omission." I glared and he laughed.

"You really can be full of fire when you get angry." He said cheerfully. "Don't worry."  
"But you aren't going to be here for to long! After Valentines Day how will I get them to him? No one's going to risk giving him the cards directly!"

"You could hide them in his office leave them in special places. Hide them under the hot cocoa Judy brings him. Be creative." He smiled slowly again and shook his head. "Don't worry. This way you can see how close he's getting."

"But I'll be helping him find ME! That's utter nonsense."

"Now calm down." He sighed, "Look, Kira, I just thought it would be a good experience for both you **and** Bernard." I opened my mouth to say something more when he raised his hand.

"I think you should get back to work, Kira. Don't want to run out of supplies." And just like that I was assigned to help Bernard track down myself.

Why did he want so desperately to find out who I was? Or rather, who the person on the cards was. It wasn't as though the card had been an obsessive love poem . . . had it? The more I thought about it the more I understood how like a love note it was.

I appear to have gotten farther into this than I realized.


	2. Recruited

The day had started out normally. First checking inventory, hiding the card at the bottom of the knitting supplies, and preparing the boxes for distribution.

Everything was set to go; the fresh ice roses indicated Bernard was here as well, meaning I had to remain on my guard. I started to log in everything we had in inventory when the other elves arrived. There were always ten-minute breaks between the morning shift and the night shift.

_Did Bernard work morning and night?_ I wondered, after all, he did disappear for long breaks in the middle of the day. Maybe he was taking a nap. I shook my head clear, embarrassed by my unsuitable thoughts. He's my boss, not some silly crush. The moment I thought it I blushed and started to furiously pack supplies into boxes, usually what I did in my spare time so I didn't have to waste time doing it during delivery.

"Kira." Came a meek voice from behind me. I turned to find my little sister, Melody, standing there with a music box in hand. She was crying a little.

My little sister had long black hair like me, but instead of my turquoise eyes she had gorgeous silvery-blue ones with long thick lashes. She had just gotten hired into the music department, her life long dream was to become one of Santa's reindeer keepers, but for now she had to settle with getting into the workshop.

"Melody? What's wrong?" I asked rushing to her. Her hands shook so much she nearly dropped the music box.

"It-it's missing a gear." She whimpered, tears soaking the collar of her shirt. She always insisted on wearing the green frock with little red bells around the hem on special occasions. Today was the anniversary of our father's death, so she wore it with the red bell earrings he had given her before he passed away.

"The music box is missing a gear?" I frowned and she nodded, tears flying though the air with surprising speed.

"It's missing the main gear. It doesn't play anymore." She sobbed a little more and I took the box, immediately feeling something wrong. I opened the back to find the main gear missing from behind the tune cylinder. Simple enough to replace.

"How did this happen?" I asked as I fixed the little box. I had to be good at these things in order to have made it anywhere near Santa's workshop.

"I came in early with you, like you know, and I was testing the music boxes. When I picked up this one it felt wrong. Lighter. So-so I l-looked inside and-" she choked down another sob and instead gave a gasp of misery before hugging me with all her strength, which wasn't much.

"It's fine. I'm sure some-elf must have just forgotten to-"

"No! Kira, that's MY box! I worked on it. I can tell because I'm the only one to have worked on boxes with the tune 'Jingle Bells'." She spun the key so it played, but instead of 'Jingle Bells' out came four simple chimes. _Chime~Chime~Chime~Chime~ . . ._

It was surprising to hear something like that, but Melody letting out a loud squeak of surprise nearly made me drop the box.

"I-I-But-Kira-that's-Eep!" she squeaked again and I rubbed her back. "Kira you have to believe me. I didn't do that to this box."

"It's okay. Someone must have tampered with this. I know you. Who else had access to this?"

"Oh, I don't . . . Anyone! Kira this is wrong. Who would do this?" She started to cry harder than ever and I squeezed her into a hug.  
"It's okay. Give this to Bernard and-"

"NO!" she nearly screamed, making a passing by elf couple stare at us. "I can't." she hissed as I waved them away. "He'll be furious with me." Her lower lip trembled as my alarm went off. I sighed.

That alarm meant I had to start to refill the supplies of all the departments. I gave her a look as I slipped the music box into my pocket.

"It's fine. It's fine. Look, Melody, I need to refill. Go back to music, do your job and I'll give this to Bernard after I refill, Okay?" she nodded and I gave her my best grin as I picked up the first pile of boxes.

"Don't worry. I'm sure it will be okay." She smiled again and scurried off.

I know this will be hard to believe, but I'm the only one in the refill department during the day shift. The night shift has six elves doing their best to keep up with all the refill orders. However, during the day, there's only me, running back and forth to deliver supplies to people before they even realize they're almost out. Most of the day people have forgotten there IS a supplies department, especially since no one ever sees me anymore.

I sprinted around the office, rushed to deliver all of the boxes when I saw Carrie, from knitting, run off to Santa's office, envelope in hand. _Perfect timing_. I thought annoyed. If Bernard comes looking for me now he wont find me in the department. I ran the last of my delivery services when I looked up to find Santa giving Bernard the letter. He took it carefully, looking at Santa with a grimace but opened it anyways. He read the letter, the words I wrote. I blushed unsure of what to do. I passed Jerry's stall, surprised to find his supplies had yet to run out. _That's odd._ I thought. _I wonder what he was doing_.

"Kira!" came a stern voice and I looked up to see Bernard waving me over. I blushed and trotted over.

"Yes?"

"Look at this." He ordered and handed me the card.

_A word of encouragement during a hard time_

_Is worth millions more than an hour of praise in a good time._

"It's . . . nice." I said quietly. "Bernard, I have something I need to talk to you about."

"Do you have any idea who could of written this?" he asked taking the note back and almost ignoring my comment. I was surprised at how calmly he did it.

"In the music department, someone tampered with a music box. They took out the tune cylinder and replaced it with a weird one and removed the main gear so it couldn't play."

"Why would anyone do that?" he asked looking up from the note, his brows knitted together and his dreadlocks hanging his face. He looked really tired.

"I-I don't know. Um . . . here's the music box." I said and handed it to him. He looked it over then inside.

"It has a main gear." He stated.

"Sorry, I put an extra one in when it was brought to me. That's when we heard it play." I reached to turn the key and brushed his hand. "Sorry!" I whispered and yanked my hand back.

"Don't be so skittish. I'm not going to bite you or anything." He glared then turned the key. The four chimes rang out again and he frowned.

"That's not normal. Who's box was this?"

"I don't think the creator did that. Look at how the inside is scratched up. It was like that when I got it. That means someone who doesn't work in the music department."

"Kira." He said hotly, "Who made this?"

"But the marks-"

"Kira!" he snapped and I drew back. "Your sister, Melody, is in the music department isn't she?" he said angrily.

"Yes . . ." I whispered.

"And she just submitted her application to be apart of the reindeer keeper's, didn't she." He stated it more than asked but I answered anyways.

"I . . . yes."

"And she got rejected." He didn't bother adding the ending.

"That's true but-"

"Kira. I'm not saying that she did this on purpose. She was probably upset and forgot the gear and made the scratches-"

"How did the tune cylinder get switched?" I insisted, holding onto anything he couldn't prove.

"She must have grabbed the wrong one-"

"And there is an abundance of 4 chime tune cylinders in the music department? Someone else had to have put that in." I demanded and he gave me a disbelieving look. "Melody wouldn't do anything to damage her reputation or her application to the other department." I insisted and he sighed.

"I'll look into it okay, but don't be disappointed if your sister did this." I beamed at his words. He would look into it, and he said 'if' not 'when'.

"Okay."

"Now can you tell me about this card?" he insisted and handed it over again.

"Um . . . I saw Carrie, from knitting, take it to Santa's office a minute ago." He stared at me with a hard glare, as though he suspected me already. "Or . . . at least . . . it looked like that note." I added, "I-I only got a . . . a glimpse from my position." He stared at me harder before leaning in. "Wha-what?" I ask leaning away, covering my face with my hair.

"That's not what I asked. Who wrote this?"

"I-I-what?"

"Kira!" he snapped and there were a few 'Oohs' from the surrounding elves and I blushed harder.

"I guess this looks like someone with really nice handwriting, probably a girl, maybe from the calligraphy section of the card department judging by the slant of the writing. The writer has long hair because you can see their hair brushed the words before it dried causing it to smudge." I burst leaning so far back I think my hair was touching the floor. I suddenly was very aware that a circle of elves surrounded us.

"Whoa there, Bernard. Antagonizing Kira now?" Santa said, breaking up the circle, "When I instructed her to work with you I didn't expect this." Bernard grimaced and glared at Santa, hands on his hips.

"Don't try to patronize me. You knew exactly what you were telling her to do when you told her to help me." I shifted to the side and checked the clock.

"I've got another refill. I better get back to work." I muttered lamely and Santa nodded.

"That goes for all of you." Bernard yelled at the other elves who jumped a little and quickly got back to work.

"Bernard . . ." Santa said warningly and lead him away from the group both of them arguing in hushed voices.

I ran back to my station, hoping to get back to work and have my day be over and done with, but I still had one surprise left in store for me. I got back to my department to find Jerry waiting for me.

"Kira! Just the girl I was looking for!" he beamed.

Oh, burnt gingerbread. I crept around my office.

"Hi, Jerry. What are you doing here?" I muttered, surprised I wasn't stuttering.

"Oh, nothing. I was just looking for you." My second alarm went off and I sighed in relief.

"You should get back to work, I have to make deliveries." I said taking up the boxes.

"Do you have just a second?"

"Not anymore. You picked a bad time to try and talk to me." I sighed and rushed off, glad for once of the speed my job needed me to do. _Goodbye creepy Jerry_. I thought as I ran off, boxes nearly falling over from my sprinting.

Over the next week Bernard started to get more and more frustrated with the lack of leads. I could tell he was anxious to question the calligraphy department but with all the extra work everyone was doing in preparation for Valentines Day Bernard became the busiest elf in the North Pole. Everyone and I mean everyone, suddenly demanded his attention and he started looking more and more exhausted by the day.

The only thing that kept him full of energy was the cards.

Despite the cards driving him crazy, they really did encourage him and make him a little happier. They did push him to keep working hard every day.

"Kira." He would greet me when I went in to give him a report, "Who was it today?" I would give him the update as well as a new theory, but it never seemed to do any good.

Soon it was only a week until Valentines Day and the whole workshop was in full swing, it was times like these I felt like I was going to die from exhaustion. Refills had to be run every other minute and I had to be careful about who I gave the letters to because if I gave them to someone who was to busy, Bernard wouldn't get them. Meaning I had to risk being caught with them for a longer period of time.

"It was Kyle today." I said as I entered the office. I had finally gotten enough time to get extra box to each department, giving me maybe five minutes. Bernard was at his desk, head propped up on his hand as he scribbled away at paperwork.  
"Really?" he asked looking up, "From reindeer crew?"

"He-he actually was helping out in the stuffing department today." I muttered embarrassed. As usual Bernard handed me the card to read. I don't know why, I always had the same analysis, girl with long hair, at least shoulder length, and left handed.

Me.

"Anything?" he asked and I looked it over, pretending I hadn't seen it before.

"Well . . . " half expecting to find something new I turned the card through my hand.

Uh, oh.

I gaped at the card. Instead of writing 'An Elf' in my usual cursive I printed it. My normal handwriting was on the card.

"The signature . . ." I said, my eyes wide and my hair covering nearly my whole face.

"What about it?" Bernard asked, pausing from his work for a moment to look at the card.

"It's printed." I whispered, unable to raise my voice, unable not to point it out. How could I have been so stupid? This was the biggest mistake I could have made. I had plenty of handwriting to compare to; my greatest protection was that Bernard didn't think me capable to send the letters.

"This is great!" Bernard smiled, he looked so happy. "Perfect! I want handwriting samples from every elf from every department and-" my watch's alarm went off and I groaned.

"Maybe later. I have to make a refill run. It's really busy today."

"Just have someone else do it." Bernard said, "I need your help now." He got up and grabbed his bag, staring at me excitedly.

"There's no one else." I whispered. Bernard stared at me for a moment, mid swing with his bag over his head.

"What?" he snapped sharply hands going to his hips. I flinched and glanced nervously at my watch.

"I-I-I-I'm the only one in that-that department."

"What?" he nearly shouted. "You mean you've been working that department all by yourself?!" I nodded.

"Y-yeah?" I said more questioning than confident.

"Well, where are the other elves?" he gaped, throwing his arms out in exasperation.

"Th-they quit years ago. I'm the only one in th-that department a-anymore."

"For how long?" he snapped, hands returning to his hips.

"About . . . t-two hundred seventy five years." I said sheepishly, "I really need to go, it's busy today."

"Wait, let me just wrap my head around it." He huffed and crossed his arms putting a finger to his forehead.

"I really need to go. Feel free to walk with me, but I need to deliver the supplies." I turned to run off when I felt Bernard grab my hand. His hand was calloused and warm. Safe.

"You never complained. No one ever complains about the refill department. How do you do it?" I blushed and shrugged.

"I have a system. You're free to join me on my route." I murmured, embarrassed. He nodded.

"Alright. Let's go. But you have to explain things to me on the way." He said pointing at me testily. I smiled, feeling courageous and the tiniest bit wryly.

"If you can ask questions, that is."

"What is that supposed to mean?" he snapped and I drew back, all courage gone.

"Nothing! Sorry . . ." I mumbled but he looked a little apologetic, quickly covering up the look with a hard frown.

"Show me."

When I told Bernard he wouldn't be able to ask me questions, I meant it.

I had to run back and forth from my office to the different departments in order to deliver everything, and doing all of that was a lot of energy. Bernard, who did his rounds once an hour, didn't have all of the endurance I had built up over two hundred seventy five years.

"You okay?" I asked nervously, outside of the kitchen. "I could just talk to you later." I tried but he shook his head.

"The . . . Night shift . . . is always late . . . I need to . . . give them some . . . structure." He panted glaring up at me.

"Well, I could just write down my route." I smiled pitifully but he just glared up at me.

"Keep going. Tell me how you do this." He commanded, managing to keep everything together. I could tell he was exhausted beyond belief, even though we were only halfway through the route.

"Um, O-okay. Well . . . back when there were still five people in this department I was the one who answered the calls for refills, and I sent out elves. When I did, I started to notice a pattern, seeing the same thing everyday will do that to you. Anyways, I started being able to tell who was calling before I answered the phone. To test my theory I wrote out a schedule of who needed to be delivered for and when, and stayed home sick." He frowned disapprovingly and I grimaced, "I know it was wrong but when I got in the next day the other elves said my note had been exactly on. When that happened they started slacking, thinking someone else would get the packages, and someone else did . . . me." We arrived at mechanics and I dropped off the supplies heading back, Bernard managing to keep pace, but he was panting so hard I wasn't sure if he was trying to ask something or just breathing heavy. "Um well . . . eventually I took over the whole route, that was three hundred years ago, and I was doing all the work.

"Then I was actually sick. It was dreadful, I remember waking up and thinking I was dying. Well that was a real wake up call to the others. They hadn't memorized the schedule or the portions like I had and they went into a panicked state. Everything went to summer and they were unable to get much work done that day. The next day everyone quit, except me of course." We got back to the office and had just a minute until the wrapping department ran out. I stopped and waited for Bernard to catch his breath as I busied myself with the boxes.

"They just quit?" he breathed, his hair was disheveled and I swear he was thinking about how to punish the absent elves.

"Well, they couldn't handle the embarrassment of being so lazy. They all felt bad about it and so ashamed they quit. I didn't really mind too much so I just kind of kept working." I smiled and picked up the boxes. "Ready?" he nodded but I paused for a moment longer.

"Any question before we leave?" he thought for a moment.

"How do you keep it up for so many years, without any complaints?" I smiled and started to trot, Bernard striding to keep pace.

"Well, elves are all consistent, even with other elves gone they still remain pretty much the same rate and even if they're slower I still give them more stuff. I've been doing such a good job hardly anyone remembers there IS a refill department. I've become a shadow, a magic that keeps the elves from running out presents to make." I smiled absently as we ran. "It's really nice, to be the base for the spirit of Christmas without having all the pressure of it." Bernard stared at me, eyes going wide as he watched me.

"Beautiful . . ." he whispered, breathlessly. I turned beat red and gaped at him.

"Wh-wha-what?" I stuttered. Bernard's eyes widened and he turned away, making use of his heavy breathing as a diversion and coughed.

"The way you describe it, it's beautiful." He said harshly, as though it were an excuse, "It's exactly how I feel." He added, softly, so soft I almost thought I imagined it, if not for the pink tinge spreading across his ears and face, and it wasn't from the running.

"Ah, I j-just didn't know what you . . . we're h-here." I said as I reached the Designing department. Two more stops then we were done.

"Why don't you complain?" Bernard asked, trying to break the silence.

"Why should I? I know how to do my job, and I like it. I don't really need to complain. Besides, no one likes this job like I do, I'd only be taking them away from what they really want to do."

"But it must be hard on you?" he said, his exhaustion had gotten to the point where one couldn't tell he was exhausted any more, but his face was still red.

"I've gotten used to it. Making things easy would make me feel like I'm not doing anything." Bernard looked at me for a moment longer before nodding.

"I understand." He said and ruffled my hair. "Keep up the good work." He said and we continued in silence. Both of us unwilling to break it now.

The next stop was the testing department, because all they needed were spare parts once in a while. Quinton was testing a new idea for Santa's sleigh when we arrived.

" 'Ello Kira." He said in his thick English accent. He was one of the only elves to know me and call me by name. "Is Bernard making sure you stay on task today?" he joked and I smiled.

"Hey Quinton. He's just seeing how I do this on my own." The English elf nodded knowingly.

"I see. It is quite impossible, right Bernard?" Quinton asked and Bernard nodded, tired and unwilling to speak. Quinton smiled. "Have you been running and keeping up with her this whole time?" he scoffed and Bernard grimaced.

"Is that so unbelievable?"

"No –impressive, maybe, but not unbelievable. I tried that once but I ended up feinting halfway through. She's really super-elfen." He smirked at me and I blushed.

"I collapsed my first time running the whole thing too." I muttered and he laughed.

"Well, thanks for the supplies, we almost ran out." He handed the box over to another elf. "Take care of her Bernard, though I suppose I don't need to tell you that." Bernard blushed and glared at Quinton. "Try to keep it professional." He joked and went back to the sleigh just in time for it to let out a fume of smoke.

"Now what?" Quintin sighed then grimaced at Kira. "Don't suppose you could spare a minute?" he asked and I shook my head.

"One more stop, sorry." I said and we left.

"You didn't seem nervous talking to Quinton." Bernard said icily.

"Hm? Oh, that's because Quinton and I have known each other for a long time." I smiled. "He used to have a crush on me. Back when we were like three hundred."

"Oh really?" Bernard glared, "It better not interfere with your work."

"Wha- no! I don't-we aren't- it doesn't!" I stuttered and he turned away, glaring at nothing. I couldn't help but feel he didn't believe me. "I-if anything me not stuttering is-is the opposite of th-that!" I said turning red. We got back to the shop and Bernard looked at me disbelievingly, "When I t-talk smoothly it's a sign of comfort! I-It's like I've accepted him as-as a brother!" I glared as I piled boxes onto myself. "So don't even think that I-I think of him l-like that!" I snapped but turned to sharply and the boxes came tumbling down, me with them.

"Ah!" I screamed, my eyes closing.

"Kira!" Bernard yelled and I was suddenly being covered. I hit the ground hard, and I could hear the crashing of boxes but none of them fell on me. "Are you okay?" Bernard panted and I opened my eyes to see Bernard's face inches from mine. I closed my eyes again and covered my face with my hair and I blushed.

"I-I-I-I-I-" I spluttered, trying to say I was fine, but the closeness of the encounter made me so nervous I couldn't talk.

"Here." He said and he pulled me to my feet. His hands were firm and callosed, but gentle as they helped me to a chair. When they pulled away I started shaking again. I started whispering nonsense, anything I could. My eyes were still closed as I rocked back and forth.

"N-nothing b-b-between us. N-nothing. F-fine, fine. No-no. Work needs to be done. D-don't waste you p-pity on me. No, N-nothing." I could hear Bernard moving things around and I dared to take a look through my curtain of hair. He was packing things into the boxes again, careful to check if anything was broken, but not much was. That was the Woodwork department's supplies; it's hard to break chunks of wood.

"Can you walk?" he asked and I nodded. "You have to be more careful!" He yelled, "You could have been hurt! You could have been seriously injured!" he ran out of breath quickly and shook his head, "Then what would we have done? How would we have continued working with that over our heads? Our delivery resupply elf getting put in the hospital?" His face was red from yelling and I nodded all the time whispering apologies over and over.

"Are you okay?" he asked again, still sounding agitated but also concerned.  
"I-I'm f-fine. This is the last one so I'll just get it over with and take my break. It's the midday s-so most elves are-are taking a break." I whispered. "Are-are YOU okay, B-bernard?"

"Don't strain yourself. If you can't walk I can do it. We don't want another accident." He scolded, ignoring my question.

"No!" I snapped and he drew back, "I'm not going to put more work on you than I have to. The last stop is woodwork. You've seen the whole route so go back to work. Don't waste time on me." I said sounding surprisingly smooth, considering. Bernard stared at me for a moment then shook his head.

"I haven't seen the whole route, I'm going through with it until the end." I didn't smile, but I wanted to. I got up and collected the boxes, wobbling a little as I did so but managing to stay standing. Bernard put his hand on my shoulder to steady me and I looked at him, eyes wide and hidden behind my hair.

"Thanks." I whispered and he gave a half smile.

"You're welcome."

It turns out the woodwork people had a problem of their own when a rouge baseball bat went underfoot of an elf and made it so we were right on time instead of late.

"What's going on here?" Bernard asked as the girl who fell trembled at her station.

"S-sorry sir. I'll get back to work . . . right away." She said slowly and tried to stand.

"Look at how you're shaking!" Bernard snapped, "Take a break and get your bearings. It's better to do great work a little later than to make some poor kid a misshapen rocking horse." He ordered and the girl nodded, unsure of what else to do. "Drink something to help the shock." He insisted and handed her a glass of hot chocolate.

I smiled as he scolded her for being to careless then felt a pang of sadness. Why was I sad? This girl hadn't been hurt. Bernard was being his usual sneakily caring self. The girl was blushing and going to recover fine-

Blushing.

Suddenly I understood exactly why I was a little sad and I gaped at the scene.

Was I jealous?

I drew back physically, as though I could leave the thought, the feeling, behind. Leave it where it lie.

But I couldn't.

It followed me like a cloud of bitter dust and I felt myself start to cry.

_I have to get out of here_. I thought. _I have to go_. I turned and ran, not looking back. I half expected Bernard to call after me, but he didn't, no one did. How could they? _They don't know who I am_. And for the first time ever that thought made me feel scared, instead of proud.

I ran from the entire building, stopping outside to watch Santa play a round of tinsel football. My tears freezing on my cheeks as I stared.

"Kira?" came Melody's meek voice. "Are you okay?" I turned to see her with two cups of hot chocolate. "I thought you might want some of Judy's hot cocoa." I smiled. My sister always knew when I was upset, I stopped caring how.

"Thanks, Melody." I whispered. How could I be upset when my little sister was around? How could I be upset about something so stupid? I took the cocoa from her and drank.

Why was I upset? Was it because she had gotten more attention than I did, or because of who was giving the attention?

I pushed the thought out of my head and enjoyed the hot liquid burning my throat. _Don't be silly, it was a fluke, nothing more_.

"What's wrong Kira?" Melody asked holding her own cup with both of her hands as she stared at me.

"Hm?" I asked then smiled at her, "It's nothing."

"It's not nothing. You're really upset. What is it?" she pressed and I grimaced.

"I-" what should I tell her? What was wrong? I didn't want to tell her everything but I couldn't' lie to Melody, she always knew. I stared into her huge eyes and smiled sadly. "I had an accident. I fell in my department while holding some boxes. I almost go really hurt, but luckily I wasn't hurt. It kind of shocked me." I said. That must have been why I was so upset. I had been shocked from the accident and I gave me weird side affects. I sighed, feeling much less guilty and smiled.

"Oh my! Are you okay?" she asked, even though I had just said I was.

"Of course, it just scared me. Luckily it was my last stop and they had a little problem as well so I wasn't even late."

"Oh dear! Two accidents in one day! How odd!"

"Don't forget about the music box." I reminded her and she nodded.

"And that. Everything is just going weirdly." She said taking a sip of her hot chocolate. Santa was being dog piled in the snow below us. "Kira, do you think I'll ever make it into the reindeer keepers?" Melody asked and I stared at her. How could she say such a thing? I wrapped my arm around her and gave a little squeeze.

"Of course! You'll get in there and then you'll become the manager, or maybe even the trainer for new reindeer! You'll be so good they'll be able to train three reindeer at a time and there will even be enough for a second sleigh crew by the time you retire!" I assured her. She looked up at me, gaping with awe.

"Do you really think so? You aren't just saying that?" she beamed.

"Obviously! Kyle better watch his back, because you're going to be taking his job soon!" I vowed and she giggled.

"I feel so relieved." She said, radiating happiness.

"Were you upset too? About not getting in again?" I asked and she looked up at me, smile still plastered on her face.

"I was, but I feel better now." She looked at the clock and sighed, "I have to get back to work. Bye Kira, feel better." Melody beamed and skipped off, whistling the tune to 'I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas'.


	3. Workshop carols

It turns out, my little disappearing act didn't go unnoticed and I found Quinton in my shop when I came back.

"Kira! Thank Christmas! I was worried about you!" he said in his usual thick accent.

"Really? Why?" I asked as I started packing my boxes for the next run.

"Well, Bernard came to the testing department in a state of panic. He was asking about you and when I asked what was wrong and if you were hurt he started yelling at me and shouting how everything was fine and it just shocked me." He said, explaining as he stared at me. "You are okay, aren't you?" he asked and I blushed, reminded of when he used to insist on helping me, just for the sake of seeming manly.

"I'm fine, the shock just got to me and I needed some fresh air." He frowned at me.

"Shock?"

"Ah! I was in an accident earlier and it really surprised me. I managed to do my last stop but it really started to affect me once I finished. I started freaking out and went outside to clear my head. Melody found me out there, like usual," he nodded knowingly as I pushed forward, "and she helped me calm down." He sighed.

"I'm glad I was worried Bernard had said something to you." When I looked suprised he smirked, "He was acting very worried." Quinton said and I gave a nervous laugh.

"Don't be silly, Quinton. No one worries about me except you and Melody." I smiled as I filled boxes.

"That's not how it appeared." He smirked. "How is Melody, anyways?" he said casually, like I didn't know he had the biggest crush on her.

"She's well. A little disappointed about not being able accepted to the reindeer keepers again, but I'm sure she'll be fine if you help her train." I said and gave him a side-glance. He was blushing. "You did used to be in that department, you could coach her." He nodded mutely and I could see the thought processing though his head. "She's also looking for a date to the Valentine's day dance." Quinton turned a Santa suit red and glared at me.

"Kira . . ." he said warningly.

"Oh come on, it'll be fun! The dancing, the masquerade, the partying. You'll love it." Quinton glanced behind me nervously then gaped.

"Bernard!" he said, surprised.

"I see you found her." Came the cold voice of the head elf. I turned, blushing.

"H-hi, Bernard." I muttered as he glared at me. His dreadlocks were all over his face and his cheeks were pink. Was he running again?

"Kira!" he snapped and strode forward. "I was looking everywhere for you! Where did you go? I needed your help!" he glared and crossed his arms in front of me. I coward away and looked down in shame.

"I-I was outside. The-the shock finally got to m-me about the . . ." I trailed off, hoping he wouldn't make me finish my sentence.

"At least tell me next time!" he scolded. "You can't just abandon work whenever you feel like it."

"S-sorry." I muttered.

"Come on. I need you!" he said and grabbed my hand, dragging me away.

"But-I need to-but-" Quinton smiled and waved goodbye to us as Bernard pulled me off. We reached his office and I was pulled inside.

"Wh-what?" I asked as he released my hand and he pulled out a huge list.

"Tell me if any of these writings match those on the card." He instructed and I realized what the list was. It was the sheet of elves. The sheet that every elf who got into Santa's workshop had to sign. I picked up the card and held it up to the sheet.

This is what he wanted me for.

The card.

"But what about my work?" I asked and he sighed.

"Once you have to deliver I'll let you go and take over, but once your done come back here and start up again." He instructed and I looked at the list.

I don't need to do this.

I already know who wrote it.

I could just tell him.

I could just say it was me.

"Bernard . . . " I whispered, "I really, I can't do this." I said but he wasn't paying attention. "Bernard." I said louder. He looked up, brown eyes staring at my face, but not seeing my eyes.

"Hm?" he said and I licked my lips. I couldn't let this go on.

"I-"

**KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK**

Pounding on the door interrupted my confession and destroyed my wave of courage. Bernard tore his eyes away from me and grimaced at the door.

"It better be important!" he shouted and in exploded Curtis. The number two elf.

"Bernard! There's a Problem!" he shouted, his slight lisp making him sound much younger than he was.

"What? Has the toy Santa enlarged himself again?" Bernard asked.

"No, we got rid of him last Christmas. It's worse than that!" Curtis exclaimed and Bernard leapt to his feet.

"What happened?" he demanded but Curtis was looking at me.

"Who's she?"

"Kira! What's wrong?" The way Bernard introduced me I wasn't sure if he was telling me to come along or if he was yelling at me.  
"What's she doing in here?" Curtis asked as Bernard lead him out of the office.

"She's helping me with something." Bernard said sounding more annoyed. "What's the big problem Curtis?" he growled testily but Curtis gave me a wave and a wink.

"What's she helping you with?"

"Curtis!" Bernard snapped and Curtis jumped, looking shocked and afraid. "You can either continue to be a complete meddling idiot and pry on my personal business or you could tell me what the big problem was in the workshop. Your choice." Curtis glanced at me then gave a disappointed sigh.

"Someone sabotaged all of the automatic toys in the Mechanical department. Nothing works. This is going to set us back two weeks, unless we can fix it." Curtis said and Bernard started clenching and unclenching his jaw. I stared at him.

"S-sabotage?" I whispered. Bernard looked at me then seemed to get hit with an idea.

"Kira!" he said more happily than I thought possible. I jumped and shifted uncomfortably.

"Y-yes?" I whispered, "What is it?" he strode over to the room and grabbed my hand leading me towards the door. I stared at our hands, unsure of what to do.

"How good are you at fixing things?" he asked smiling and Curtis gaped.

"Um . . . w-well I . . . I guess I'm pretty good. Why?" Bernard smiled.

"When Quinton asked you to spare a minute from the exploding sleigh he acted as though you could help fix the problem." I blushed and hid behind my hair.

"Well . . . yes. I'm handy around things like that because of my father." I muttered and he nodded.

"Right. Would you mind helping out a bit?" he asked and I stared at him.

"Wh-what?! No! No I couldn't . . . I'm no good with elves or . . . helping."

"Look, I really need some help with this, despite the fact that we're so far away from Christmas, this setback would cause everything to fall apart." I looked down, knowing full well everything he said was true, but also knowing the only help I could give would be an extra set of hands.

"Please." He added and I felt my chest twist in guilt and pain. Longing. I couldn't say no.

"O-okay. What do you need me to-to d-do?"

"Everybody listen up!" shouted Bernard over the panic of the elves below. They calmed down then started cheering upon seeing Bernard. "I need you all to be quiet and hear what I'm going to say!" slowly the clamor died down and they stared up at him. "I know this is a huge set back, but I have a solution. Elves will continue making their usual quota for every day, and more if they can muster it-" he was cut off by cries of protests and he ground his teeth together. I stood behind him at an angle where I could still see his face. He gave me a glanced and straightened.

"QUIET!" he screamed and a silence fell over the room. "I know it seems strange but I'm not simply abandoning these toys! I have other elves who will take over the repair of these while you all help us stay on track. If you really wish to help Christmas stay true, you will all keep working and work overtime to repair what's been damaged. Anyone who has information about this please come to me or Curtis or even Santa about it. Other than that, let's get back to work!" everyone gave a round of applause and I stared at him.

"Bernard, how am I supposed to help with the card if I'm focused on this?" He put a finger to his lips and led the way down to the tables.

"Don't worry about that. I want you working your hardest on this problem and your job. I know you have some spare time in between your runs, and I want all of that focused here and on who is sabotaging toys." He said as he walked through the shop. A few elves came running up to him and he held up his hand showing he'd be with them in a second.

"Well, wh-what about Melody? Is she still . . . still . . ." I looked at him with horror and he gave a half smile.

"She couldn't have done this. Destroying one toy in a fit of rage, maybe, but this clears her name. Whoever did that did it as a test for whatever happened here." Bernard said as he waved a hand to the room. I smiled and nodded.

"I'll do my best."

Despite the fact that I was not only juggling two shifts and trying to tell Bernard about the cards in my time, I managed to spend a surprising amount of time with the head elf. Bernard and I started eating together during our lunch shifts simply so we wouldn't have to eat alone.

"What do you think about the sabotage?" he would say sometimes.

"I-it wasn't someone who worked in the department, the toys had tons of scratches all over them, like the elf didn't know . . . how to handle the inside. The sabatour was right handed."

"Not the card sender than." I would feel a little insulted at this but hid it as best as I could. "Anything on the card?" he would say after I angrily poked my food.

"N-no." I would mutter, no longer able to gather the courage to tell him it was me but unable to lie completely. "Nothing."

One day I came into his office, carrying my lunch of warm bread, honey and a thermos of cocoa when he caught me by surprise.

"So you and Quinton are going to the Valentine's Day dance together?" he asked casually. I jumped in surprise of the question and stared at him.

"Wha-no! No, no . . . why-why would you think that-t?" I stumbled over my words and he gave a sly grimace.

"When I was running around searching for you I over heard you asking him to the dance. So he said no?"

"Wha? No! I mean . . . sort of . . . I-I never as-asked him." I insisted and Bernard took a bite of what looked like a burrito.

"Then what were you talking about?" he mumbled through a mouth full of food.

"I-well . . . My-my sister, Melody has had a crush on him since . . . forever, and he just recently started re-returning her f-feelings. He asked about her and . . . I nudged him to ask her to the dance." I muttered and took a bite of my own lunch.

"Interesting . . ." he said through another bite of food. "That's good." He nodded and I stared at him.

"W-why?" he seemed to remember I was in his office and his ears went pink.

"Well if you had asked him to the dance that would mean you two are wasting your time in a useless relationship!" he shouted and took a huge bite of his food, muttering nonsense to himself.

"Oh . . ." I whispered, disappointedly. What did I expect from the head elf? I looked through my curtain of hair to see him glancing at me, his face red and embarrassed. It was the most adorable thing I've ever seen.

I couldn't help but smile.

The next day, at the end of the day, I officially got off of doing over time with the soldiers, the last one being repaired and no more mishaps occurring. I was thoroughly surprised when Curtis came up to me when it was all over, smiling and blushing like a schoolboy.

"Hi there Kira!" he said through his childish lisp. "How's it going?"

"Um . . . good . . . C-curtis." I whispered and stared at him, unsure of what to do. Curtis was almost three centuries younger than me and that meant he was just on the edge of off limits.

"So . . . you and Bernard are going to the Valentine's Day dance together?" he asked as I started to pack up my things. Everything I was holding fell to the floor with a loud crash and I gaped at him.

"Wh-wha-wha-wha-what?" I stuttered, my whole face turning Santa suit red.

"Well, it's just that, you two have been spending a lot of time together. A lot of elves around here think you two are going out." He pressed and I waved my arms in some strange attempt to tell him we weren't.

"No! M-m-me and B-b-b-bernard? No no no no no . . ." I spluttered. "He doesn't think of me like that. We're just f-f-f . . ." I trailed off, unsure if he counted me as a 'friend' or not, "He doesn't think of me like that." I stated again, and suddenly a pang of sadness washed over me. "I-I have to go." I insisted and scooped up my things running.

Why did that make me so sad?

What on earth was going on?


	4. Sick

Pain.

That's what I awoke to the next morning. Fiery pain spreading through my body as I lay in bed, a loud ringing tearing at my brain. _Sacred Snowmen, am I on fire?_ I thought and peeled my eyes open to examine myself. _Is that the fire alarm?_

No fire, just a headache, stomachache, slight temperature and a weak digestive system. My alarm sat across the room going off with a loud ringing noise. _I'm sick. _I thought miserably. _Really really sick. _I rolled over, hoping the torture device across the room would silence itself, but it didn't.

I struggled to a sitting position, hafting to stop at the edge of my bed so the nausea didn't take over my stomach and cause me to puke my lungs out.

Mistake.

I immediately regretted sitting up and struggled to keep whatever was in my stomach where it was. I glared at the evil noise machine across the room.

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!

It screamed, like an angry grandmother and I grabbed my stuffed reindeer to throw at it.

_Call Bernard. _My mind pleaded, _You need to call Bernard._

_Not now._ I thought back, my blurred gaze set on the tiny device. It had fooled me all this time, earning my trust by dutifully awakening me when I asked. _Now it dies_. I glared.

Now the betrayal showed through.

I groaned and stood; reaching for the horrendous device but my nausea betrayed me and I stumbled forward, blindly waving my hands. Luckily I managed to hit the alarm clock so it went flying from the wall, chord ripped from it's socket. The chirping of the alarm abruptly ceased.

Unluckily, I didn't have any strength to catch myself on anything and ended up crashing to the ground.

I moaned from my new position on the floor, unable to pick myself up I re-adjusted the blanket and grabbed my stuffed reindeer, which lay on the floor beside me falling asleep.

"Sick, sick, sick . . ."

I awoke to a loud banging.

"Kira?" came the familiar obnoxious voice. Louder pounding and he called again. "Kira!"

"What?" I groaned, "Come in." Moments later Curtis tromped into my room, trying to be quiet but failing miserably. I tried to look up at him but my head was to hevy to lift.

"Holy Snowstorm! Are you okay, Kira?" I managed to roll my head towards him and give a sarcastic snort.

"Oh yeah, I just felt like skipping work today and-" I shot up with amazing speed and stood staring at Curtis. "Son-of-a-stocking! I almost forgot!" I staggered to my knocked over nightstand and sifted through the collateral of my fight with the alarm clock. There lay the pre-made card for Bernard and I handed it to Curtis.

"Give that to Bernard, but don't let him know it's from me or you. Give it to Judy or Crystal to bring in to him." I instructed then weakly fell back onto my bed, shivering violently.

"Oh my chestnuts. Here let me help you." Curtis lifted the blanket with magic and gently lowered it onto my body. I continued to shiver, but I was getting warmer. "Kira, why do you have this card for Bernard?" I looked towards Curtis. He had a sad disappointed face on him and I sighed.

After ten minutes I finally explained and convinced Curtis to give the card to Bernard when he got back to the station.

"So why are you here Curtis?" I asked, my throat ached, my head was pounding and I was going to fall asleep soon.

"Oh! Bernard sent me over to check on you. He was worried sick." I felt the same pang of regret, still unsure of what it was for. "He would have come himself but he had to work with the elves, you know, them freaking out and all. Anyways, he hired 4 extras from the waiting list and they still couldn't keep up with the orders. Everyone's starting to appreciate how hard you work with how much they have to pick up when you're gone." Slowly the pang ebbed away until it was only a little nudge in the back of my mind. I nodded.

"Oh. I hope it wasn't too bad." I muttered and Curtis sighed.

"Bernard was really worried. I have to call him, so I'll be here for about an hour. Do you need anything?"

"Can you make me some soup or something?" I said roughly. Curtis nodded happily.

"Sure. I'm goanna call Bernard and I'll start the soup. Should I let him talk to you?" I thought for a moment then suddenly the nudge emerged again.

"No. I don't want to talk to him." I pouted, realizing how stubborn I sounded. Curtis seemed surprised but nodded. He left and I could hear him talking on the phone.

"She doesn't feel well enough to talk . . . no . . . no . . . well . . . she said she couldn't . . . maybe she did say wouldn't . . . I don't know!"

I rolled over, annoyed and tried to ignore Curtis. My stomach growled and it triggered my entire body to turn against me. I sighed. My head was pounding, my ears were ringing, my entire body was sore, and I was freezing, not to mention I now had to go to the bathroom. I rolled off the bed and climbed to my feet, struggling to get across the hall.

_Note to self, hunt down the architect and kill him_. I thought disoriented. I managed to make it to the bathroom, with little to no problem but as I was trying to get back I somehow collapsed again and was found by Curtis.

"Burt Gingerbread, Kira can't you ask for help?" I only groaned in response.

Lead by my exhaustion and hunger, Curtis helped me back into bed and fed me some bland chicken noodle soup. It scalded my throat but I was thankful for the head as I choked it down. My stomach rolled uncomfortably, but I managed to keep the food down.

After an hour of Curtis doing quick little chores and me slowly consuming the remainder of the soup. Who knows when I would have the energy to eat again? I finally had gotten to another point of exhaustion where I was zoning into unconsciousness when I heard Curtis, vague but clear at the edge of my mind.

"Kira. I have something I want to ask you, and I know it may not be a good time but there's not much time left." I grunted in response, hearing him but not able to respond. "Well, I was wondering if maybe, you know, if you want, not going to force you or anything-"

"Curtis, I'm going to fall asleep." I mumbled and he nodded, still sputtering.

"Well, maybe you would consider, if you're available, to go to the Valentine's Day dance with me?" There was a silence for a moment when my stupid mouth agreed.

"Sure. Yeah, why not?" Curtis was beaming and he started to proceed more confidently.

"Great! I'll meet you there at six then! I'd pick you up but I have to run a quick errand for Santa before I can go." I nodded vaguely.

"Sure, fine. Whatever." I grumbled, soon to be asleep when Curtis sighed with relief.

"Great! Yeah!" I could tell we were going in circles then my body saved me.

"Wait, Curtis?" he paused, probably terrified I would suddenly change my mind.

"Just as friends. We haven't known each other long enough to go as more than that." I insisted and he sighed with relief and nodded.

"That's fine! I agree completely! I have to go now, but if I don't see you at work I'll see you at the dance! I'll meet you under the chandelier. You'll know where when you see it!" He turned and scrambled from my apartment, cheering and hollering with excitement and I rolled over and fell asleep.

Temporarily, I was unaware of what I had gotten into yet again.


	5. Desirable affections

Somehow I recovered in time for work the next day. On my way into the building I nearly ran into Bernard as he opened the door. He seemed furious.

"You're late." He growled and I blushed.

"L-late?" I muttered.

"Yes. You're going to miss it." He grabbed my hand and dragged me into the building.

"Wh-what? What's going on? B-bernard?" he silenced me with a glare and shoved me through another door into the big workshop.

Loud cheers erupted from the room and I was stunned into silence.

Every single elf from the morning shift stood in front of me. They were clapping and cheering. The noise was mind numbing and I gaped at them all.

"Welcome back, Kira." Bernard called and slowly the cheering ebbed away. I turned to Bernard, blushing so hard it could be seen through my hair. "After yesterday, even though it was difficult without you, we all realized how under appreciated you were!" he announced. I felt my entire body flutter. My entire heart shiver and I stared, afraid of what was happening. "When I heard you would be able to come back to work today, pushing yourself to the limit, I decided we should all greet you here." I felt the tears before they fell, but my hair covered them as they slid down my cheeks. "Also, we would just like to say thank you for working so hard all the time. You are the base of this entire factory, and we respect you for it- Kira?" the tears had emerged at last and I choked a sob. "Kira? What's wrong?" Bernard insisted and I quickly tried to cover up the tears.

"Nothing is wrong. Nothing is wrong." I stuttered, but everyone fell silent. "This is all so perfect. I can't help it. My stomach feels like it's going to explode." I whispered and Bernard laughed. "Thanks for this." I turned to everyone and grinned as big as I could, but it wasn't big enough.

No mere expression could define my happiness.

"Thank you everyone!" there were more cheers; I was greeted by a ton of elves when the bell for the morning shift to begin rang. Bernard gave me a look of discipline, but he was also smiling mischievously.

"Everyone back to work!" The elves trickled away and I was left hurrying off to my office.

"Kira?" Bernard called before I could rush off. I looked at him slowly and he gave his best smile. "Come with me for a second?" I trailed after him and he led me to his office. Inside were two girl elves, they looked my age but had older faces than mine.

"This is Ava-" he pointed to the girl with beautiful black hair and grey eyes, "And Mina." He gestured to the girl with dark red hair and a strange purple tint on her eyes. "They're going to be added to your department, after what happened yesterday." They nodded simultaneously, blushing at Bernard and I realized they had a slight crush on the head elf. I felt a tinge of rage but repressed it.

"Oh . . . Hi. I-I'm Kira." The greeted me in the same voice.

"Hey!"

"Anyways, I decided if they get as good as you got, as quickly as you got, then we wouldn't need more than three." Bernard explained and I nodded.

"That's-That's fine." I muttered. I felt a little cheated, but I had no idea why. Bernard eyed me for a moment then waved us away.

"Go ahead and get to work then." The girls grinned at me and hurried out but I paused.

"Bernard I-" I cut myself off then sighed.

"Hmm?" Bernard asked looking up at me. He had a clip board in hand and a pen.

"I agreed to go to the dance with Curtis." I blurted and he dropped his things.

"What? When?" he glared, his voice had risen to a shout.

"When he came to visit me when I was sick. I just thought you should know that I'd be wasting my time on useless social things." I snipped then turned and stormed out of the room.

"Kira!" he called after me but I ignored him.

I don't know what I was doing, but I could tell I wanted Bernard to notice.

Bernard and I tried to avoid each other for the rest of the day, me because I was frustrated at him adding the two girls to my team, him because he was angry I had told him about going to the dance.

However, whenever I had to deliver I found Bernard waiting there, obediently helping with whatever it was he had been called for. Usually Santa was there, asking Bernard silly things that he obviously knew.

I wonder if he knew we had a fight?

"Wow did you see Bernard?" Ava asked after another route. I'm surprised she was able to talk, considering her breathing was heavier than a polar bear running across the north pole.

"Oh yeah! If I hadn't been there I'd have thought he was following us on purpose."

"You know, if he wasn't head elf I'd go after him" Ava winked and Mina grinned.  
"Oh I know what you mean! Cute as a puppy-"

"With a bite like a hound." Ava gasped for air as she slumped into a chair. I tried to busy myself with packaging but I couldn't help but overhear what they were saying. "He's so snappy I always feel nervous around him." Mina said and Ava nodded.

"Tell me about it. That could just be because he's so cute though." She reminded and Mina giggled.

"How could I forget? What do you think Kira? You spend a lot of time with him."

"Yeah, tell us what the cutie's like." Ava said leaning forward with new strength.

"Um . . . I-I think he's . . . nice . . . in his own way. Can we not talk about this? We have another route in 16 minutes." I whispered, blushing like crazy. Luckily my hair was long enough they couldn't really see.

"Are you two dating?" Ava asked suddenly and I dropped the box I had. Luckily it was just paper.

"W-wha-wha-wha-what?" I couldn't even hear myself.

"Are you and Bernard together?" Mina persisted and I shook my head violently.

"No! He doesn't like me like that!"

"But you like him like that?"

"Wha-No!" I insisted and they glanced at each other.

"Are you saying that because you're embarrassed or because you don't know how you feel yet?"

"Isn't there an option where I don't really like him?" I squeaked and they exchanged looks.

"No." they agreed and turned to me.

"Well I don't like him so there." I snapped and there was a quiet knock on the door. "Come in!" I snapped hastily, thankful for the diversion. Melody peaked through the door.

"You okay, Kira?" she muttered and I sighed.

"Thank snow! Come on in." I insisted and she crept in.

"Ava? Mina?" she asked when she caught sight of my co-workers.

"Woah, Melody? Wait does this mean Kira is that sister you talk about?" Ava asked and Mina shushed her. Melody smiled sheepishly as I turned to her.

"What do they mean by that?"

"Oh, ah . . . I may have . . . been . . . talking with them about . . . you . . . and Bernard." She muttered, poking her fingers together nervously. I moaned.

"No wonder they think I like him." I complained and they grinned at each other.

"Come on, you totally do." Mina smiled.

"Totally." Agreed Ava.

"I'm sorry." She muttered, "I didn't used to talk about your romantic life. I just liked to talk about how hard you worked when-"

"Wait just a second!" I shouted, "I don't have a romantic life! I am simply working with Bernard on something at Santa's instructions!"

"The cards." All three of them said at once and I sighed.

"Yes, those. Anyways, I have to work with-" I suddenly felt like an idiot. Once again I had almost forgotten about the card and I sighed.

"You forgot to put it in a box, didn't you?" Mina asked and I glared at her.

"Did you tell them that too, Melody?" she blushed. I sighed. So much for Melody

"Could one of you give it to him? Say you found it in a box, or something, and I told you to bring it to him saying I already read it and have nothing to add." I said and handed it to Ava. She grinned and winked.

"Count on me. I'll tell that cutie all he needs to know-"

"Don't you dare tell him I sent it!" I glared and she smiled.

"Don't worry. I wont." She skipped off and I glared at her retreating figure.

"Trust me, even if we like to gossip, we always keep our word." Mina assured me and I sighed.

"I hope so."

"Why are you so mad at Bernard?" Melody asked suddenly and I sighed.

"I'll tell you at lunch." I sighed and continued packing, "But for now I have to work on my job. 4 minutes until another route."

"Let's just hope this one is equally as scrumptious." She winked and Melody shook her head.

"I have to get back to work. Mina, try not to bug my sister too much. She's really powerful." She warned and I glared. Did Melody have to tell these two everything? As soon as Melody closed the door Mina turned to me.

"So, Kira . . ."

"Yes?" I snapped and she grinned mischievously.

"You never answered our question. Do you like Bernard?"

"I don't know. Yes? No?" I said frustrated.

"Why don't you know? Is it because we just met or because you really don't know?"

"I don't know! Both!" I shouted and sighed again, "How should I know? It doesn't matter anyways, we aren't even talking to each other." Mina gasped and Ava returned from her errand.

"What's the gossip?" Mina explained and Ava clicked her tongue at me.

"No wonder you had me deliver it. He was furious when I told him the message. Nearly zapped me out of there."

"Don't be ridiculous, Bernard wouldn't zap anyone, he'd loose his job."

"Well I'm telling you he almost did. He suddenly clenched up and told me to get out. Anyways, Kira, I know you're our superior and all but let us give you some advice." I glanced at the clock.

"Two minutes. Then we have a run and after that a lunch break. Better hurry."

"You need to assert yourself." I started to turn away in annoyance but Mina stepped in front of me.

"We're serious, Kira. Guys are just as scared of girls when it comes to love,-"

"Even more so when it's a love like yours." Added Ava,

"Exactly, that's why you have to push it. Let him know you're interested." We stood there in silence and Mina started up again.

"And if you're unsure how to do it we'll help you." She winked. The timer went off and I sighed, picking up the first of my boxes.

"Tell me, girls, how am I supposed to let anyone know I'm interested if I don't even know it myself." They started to speak but I interrupted them.

"I'll do this one alone. You two stay here and finish packaging those boxes of supplies. After this run is lunch break. I'll see you after that." I turned and ran out of there before they could plant any more questions in my head.

I just have to get through this and get to see Melody. I thought and slowed my pace as I entered the stuffing department. The elves greeted me warmly, finally aware of my presence, before getting back to work.

I'm not really in love with Bernard . . .

Am I?


	6. Dress Shop blues

Lunch was a relief. After the bombardment of questions from the twins (even though they weren't twins that's what I had started calling them) I raced from the shop at lightning speed. Melody was waiting for me at a table on the front lawn and she grinned at me through her thick scarf.

When she was 100 years old she caught pneumonia and got really sick. She could never stand cold weather as well as the rest of us after that.

"So what is wrong, exactly?" she asked as I slumped onto the bench. The snow was cold but I really didn't care at this point.

After eight words of explanation I was in tears. I told the whole story from when I found Bernard sick all the way up to today, and ended the whole description with the twin's suggestion.

For a while Melody just remained silent while I choked on my tears and mucus, trying to regain composure. Melody always thought out her answers before she said them, to make sure one would understand her point of view well.

"I think . . ." she started slowly, even though I was being noisy, I really wanted to hear what she had to say, "You're scared of getting rejected, so you're creating excuses to mask your true feelings." There was silence for the longest time, even my sniffling stopped momentarily as I absorbed what she said. I half expected her to add something but she quickly stated, "That is all." and fell silent.

We sat in silence for the longest time. I tried not to accept her words, but she never lied to me, not unless she thought it was best. I instead changed the topic.

"Are you going to the dance?" I asked and she beamed.

"Yes! Quinton took your advice and asked me when he helped me train. The reindeer were all cheering and it was great. We were training chet, but since he flew last christmas he's been doing much better than before." she sipped from her thermas, radiating happiness. "Thanks for that, by the way." I smirked teasingly.

"The training or the date?" she nodded but didn't say anything, though I could see her smile behind her scarf. "What are you going to wear?" she grinned mischievously at me.

"Nothing." she said in her most innocent voice. I nearly spewed my hot cocoa in her face. She giggled innocently and sipped at her own thermos. She pretended not to notice my stare.

"That's not funny." I scolded but she just smiled.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." there was more silence, but this time it was the comfortable kind.

We ate our food and we were about to leave when Melody caught my hand.

"What are you going to do, Kira?" she asked and I sighed.

"About what?" She stared at me, waiting for and answer. I tried to stare back but she was always better at this than I was.

"I won't do anything, because there's no issue." I said sounding almost angry.

"Kira, I think this won't just go away. You need to decide before you miss this chance." she sounded almost pleading.

"There's no chance to miss." I said crossing my arms smugly. "I'm fine." She noticed this and sighed. Whenever I crossed my arms, Melody pointed out, I never agreed with anything.

"Exactly. Don't you want to feel better than 'fine', Kira?" she soothed and I rolled my eyes.

"I have no interest in love or boyfriends or anything." I glared and she took her own pose, her foot planted off to her right and her left hand grabbed her right arm, which was hanging limply at her side.

"But you care about happiness, and I know Bernard makes you happy." she shot back.

"Just as a friend." I blushed. Melody threw her arms in the air with an exasperated shout.

Uh oh.

That was her finishing move.

"This is what I meant." she scolded, "You're hiding behind an excuse to cover your real feelings."

"I have to go. I don't trust the twins to deliver a route on their own yet." i said coldly and turned to storm away.

"You can't play pretend forever Kira!" Melody shouted after me.

Oh yeah? Watch me.

It was now the day before the dance, and the twins and Melody had somehow convince me to go dress shopping with them. We had left right when work got out and Ava led the way down the street. The air was crisp and snow had started to fall in fluffy clumps. I caught a few pieces on my tongue and it melted into an icy droplet of water.

"Wow, I could really go for some hot bread right now." Mina shivered and Melody grinned.

"It just so happens I have some for us!" she grinned and pulled out four rolls of honey bread.

"From Clarissa?" I asked and she nodded.

"Claire always lets me have some if I get there right after work." she bragged and we took the hot treat, savoring the sweet smell and warmth as we ate.

We passed an ice garden, couples gathered around the wishing tree and held each other's hands shyly.

"They need a little encouragement." Ava sighed. "Does anyone have any mistletoe?"

"Kira? Would you mind?" Melody asked and pointed at the tree. I grimaced.

"I don't know Melody, I haven't used it in a while." I said nervously.

"Please? Look at those couples. See that? Katie and John finally went out! Oh they're so cute! But John's the kind not to kiss unless opportunity calls for it." she looked at me pleadingly.

"Fine." I sighed, "Only for you." I smiled and closed my eyes.

"What's she doing?" Mina asked.

"Well, you see, our parents were actually top elves, they had tons of magical power, however when they created children, only Kira really got any power at all, and boy did she get a lot."

"Trying to concentrate!" I snapped, "I don't want to mess up. It's been a while since I've used magic."

"Sorry."

I visualized myself crouching on the branch. I tucked my feet under me, careful to consider how the branch would be shaped and slowly pictured myself there instead of here, pushing magic into the thought. I felt a tingle run through my body and suddenly the ground seemed to reform into a pool of water, reforming under me in the shape of a branch. I opened my eyes and found myself perched among the ice leaves of the tree, hidden from all.

I grinned, happy I was still able to pull it off and closed my palm.

Mistletoe. I thought and the same tingle shot through me and into my palm, it felt like water was forming into ice in my hand and I opened it.

There lay a cluster of mistletoe in my hand and I grinned. I blew the plant towards the branch and it seemed to vanish reappearing tied to the overhanging branch along with a bright red bow and a small, cheerful bell.

I smiled, my work finished and teleported back to the side of the garden.

"Wow! Kira, that was incredible! How did you do that?" Ava shook my hand, probably hoping to get some magic from me.

"I have way more magic than the average elf, it's just kinda how I am. Weren't we going dress shoping?" I smiled shyly.

"But hardly any elf has that much magic." Mina pressed, though we did start walking.

"Yeah, usually only head elf can do things like that!" Ava agreed.

"Well, both of our parents were powerful. But they didn't give to much magic to Claire or Melody." I said carefully. Melody smiled.

"I'd rather not have that. Think of everything you would be able to do! It'd drive me crazy!" she admitted and we all giggled.

"This must prove it!" Ava whispered to Mina who nodded. I tried to ignore them but I couldn't help but feel they were planning something.

"Good afternoon, girls!" the shopkeeper greeted. She had beautiful fire red hair and dark mysterious green eyes. "I'm Maggie, I'll be helping you with your dresses tonight." we greeted her warmly as she led us toward the back of the store. We passed many different dresses and took our time looking at them but none of them were really what we wanted.

"I'm assuming you're looking for a dress and mask for the Valentine's Day Dance?" she asked and the others nodded.

"Mask?" I asked and she smiled.

"It's a masquerade, darling."

Kira. I wanted to say but she started walking again. We were ushered into a dark room and the woman flicked on the lights.

This room was filled with mirrors. The walls had handles on each mirror and when Maggie closed the door behind us it too had a mirror on the back.

"Wow!" we all exclaimed and she smiled.

"Fantastic isn't it!" she grinned. "The ones with handles open into shelves of dresses with the maskes on top. Feel free to look at anything and everything!" she grinned and we went at it.

After an hour of searching I couldn't find anything.

"Excuse me, Maggie?"  
"Yes darling?"

"It's Kira." I mumbled, "None of these dresses are in a blue or purple. They're all warm colors."

"Ah, you want a cool color dress?" she asked. Despite her smile she sounded much more menacing.

"Well, if you have them." I said quietly. she glared then sighed.

"I'll get some for you to try." she said and left. Ava snuck up behind me as I was waiting and held my arms while Mina pinned my hair out of my face.

"Ah! Just as I though! You're adorable!" they exclaimed and Melody giggled. She had found her dress and was now helping the twins look for a dress.

"I'm still getting the dresses out of storage but try these on while you're wait-" she cut off when she caught a glimpse of my face. She looked furious but quickly covered it.

"What a unique expression!" she purred then handed me the dresses. "I think you'll look terrific in any of those." she smiled, coldly. Melody looked over the dresses then glared.

"Maggie, these are all warm colors. Whenever Kira wears warm colors she looks like she's sick and puffy. she needs cool colors if she want's to look nice."

"Well I think she'll look perfect in any of those dresses." Maggie smiled. They all took a stand behind me and glared.

"Cool colors." demanded Melody, "Or we'll leave and take our business elseware." Maggie looked exasperated then turned and stalked off.

"Geeze, what's her problem?" Mina scoffed.

"I hear she used to work at Santa's workshop but quit to start her own business."

"Wow, really?"

"Guys, it's not nice to gossip." Melody scolded. Magggie returned pushing a cart of dresses ranging from deep purples to mild greens.

"There you are." she struggled to maintain her cheerful attitude. "Any of these suit your fancy, darling?" Melody looked through the dresses then grinned.

"This one. This one is perfect."

We finally got out of there and headed back to my apartment with our dresses giggling. We passed Katie and John on our way home, they both were blushing like crazy, but held tight to each other's hands.

"Cute! You see, Kira! Magic is a great gift!" Melody praised. I smiled.

"I'm glad you think so. But I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to give any to you."

"Oh, I don't want any, you're the only one it suits." she grinned and we giggled.

"I hope you're right, because having magic feels a little strange knowing no one else matches my power."

"Aside from lover boy." teased Mina,

"Yes, aside from him." Agreed Ava.

We all laughed.


	7. Feelings of mystery

The day of the dance and me and Bernard still weren't talking. I even refused to see him about the cards even when ordered. I don't know when or how I got all this courage when just a week ago I was having trouble telling him I was even sending the cards. Half of me wanted to throw it in his face and storm off never to speak to him again, but the other half pulled me back and told me not to ruin what I had, to be careful not to do anything drastic.

Bernard had set a quota for us to reach in order to be let out of work early. Most elves were working their hardest in order to reach this quota, meaning I had to work hard to keep up with the high demand.

Ava and Mina were going through training fine, and were able to do two runs on their own, though I didn't let them if I could help it.

And sometimes I couldn't help it.

Santa was making a direct point to get me and Bernard close to each other as possible, though we still hadn't spoken. It was on one of these occasions that I was captured again.

"Ah! Kira!" he exclaimed as I ran into the testing department. I looked over to see Santa waving me down, Bernard dutifully by his side. We caught each others eye and turned away, me to santa with my face hidden behind my curtain of hair. I dropped the box off and, unable to pretend I hadn't heard, walked over.

"You can help us out here." he smiled. He gestured to Bernard who I spared a glance. Bernard was looking straight at me. Simply trying to see me and I blushed nodding to Santa.

"O-okay."

"Good. I need you to go under the sleigh and work on the engine. for some reason when we tried to increase the power the engine doesn't work."

"What?" I squeaked. I was claustrophobic. It was one of the reason's I didn't work in the testing department.

"You'll be fine. You need to just tell Bernard what you're doing so I can do something to help on this end." he pointed to the secondary (emergency) engine.

"Oh . . ." I murmured, I couldn't say no, no matter my phobia nore my desperation not to speak with Bernard (though I also wanted desperately to talk to him) I couldn't disobey Santa's orders. I took a deep breath and lay down, carefully sliding under the sleigh.

Good thing you wore a skirt today. I noted in the back of my mind. I whimpered and rearranged my legs so they weren't unseemly.

"I-I'm readjusting the springs so they'll release more when the power shoots through here." Bernard glanced at me.

"So you're talking to me now." he sighed and relayed the info. I didn't answer, my hands were shaking and I struggled to stay calm. Why was air so short down here? Was I being suffocated?

"I-I'm releasing the pressure in the cylinder." I called, my voice was shaking so much there was a long pause before Bernard relayed the information.

"Kira are you okay?"

"I-I'm fine. Just a l-l-little m-more." There was a loud hiss and I screamed. Reeling back out from under the sleigh I threw myself into Bernards arms, squeezing my eyes shut as I clung to him.

"That's perfect." Santa called as he too revealed himself. "Oh! What happened?"  
"I-I couldn't d-do it." I whispered, "I was-I was t-too . . ." Bernard hesitantly hugged me back.

"You're fine. You're safe. Don't worry." I sobbed and Santa looked around clearing his throat.

"Bernard. Maybe you should take Kira to get some hot chocolate, she had a pretty rough time." Santa edged and Bernard led me away. There were cheers and whoops in delight, as well as some suggestive comment directed towards us, but I was too shaken to care.

We entered the kitchen, nearly running into the elf who had found my card and they bowed past us. Bernard watched them run off but didn't follow, instead helping me into a chair out of the way.

"Judy!" he snapped and she came running.

"Yes, Bernard?" he gestured to me.

"Hot cocoa." she grinned and gave me a quick look over.

"What happened?"

"I don't know. She just had a panick attack under the sleigh."

"What?" Judy shrieked and trotted off murmuring angrily to herself. After All the weeks I had been sending cards, Judy and I had become very close. She came running back with a blanket and handed me the steaming cup while she swung the covering over my shoulders. I burned my tongue taking a sip of the scalding liquid as Bernard turned to her, stepping protectively in front of me.

"Why did she have a panic attack?" he demanded and she glared at him.

"Kira has Claustrophobia, you dunce. She can't stand to be in enclosed spaces." Bernard drew back as though she had physically hit him, then went on the defensive.

"You dare to call your superior a 'dunce'." he glared and the kitchen slowed, 'oohing' in encouragement.

"Only when they're being one." she retorted back and the crowd 'oohed even louder. I whimpered in protest drawing everyone's attention.

"Don't fight." both of them swung to me and the kitchen started up again. Bernard didn't apologize but he held his tongue while Judy sighed.

"Sorry, Kira. I was just worried about you." she said then glared at Bernard. "Don't you have work to do?" she snapped and he grimaced before storming off, pretending he wasn't looking back worriedly. "So I hear you're going to the dance with Curtis." she murmured, blushing like crazy. I raised my eyebrows in surprise.

"I-I am." I replied, unsure if Curtis was asking me to make Judy jealous. She nodded solemnly.

"Of course. I'll see you later Kira." she muttered and turned, following Bernard's leave.

The rest of the day was much more uneventful. After my panic attack I was given a short break before I had to go fill the rush orders again. Luckily, though Santa made a point that Bernard and I saw each other, he didn't ask me to help him anymore.

The most exciting thing that happened was the twins bombarding me with questions about how Bernard reacted to my panicking, though it turned out that they had seen the whole thing, doing a run while I helped at the station.

"It was so cute, you just ran up and hugged him!" Ava squealed. Apparently we had become the 'OTP'(a slang term for favorite couple) in the workshop and many were thinking of ways to 'get us together'.

"And he was blushing so hard he wasn't sure what to do," Mina started, " because he really wanted to hug you-"

"REALLY badly!" Added Ava,

"Yeah, really really badly, but he also had to keep appearances up so he hesitated, until he realized he couldn't resist!"

"So cute!" squealed Ava again and Mina chimed in.

It went on like this for a while, me occasionally reminding them I had been there and therefore they didn't have to tell me everything that happened, but usually I was ignored.

When the day ended I think I was the happiest elf in the whole workshop.

But my day wasn't over yet.


	8. Heartbreak

I lingered back, wanting to finish some things up, and thank Bernard without prying eyes. As elves streamed out of the workshop I saw Bernard hesitate by the stairs as he watched everyone file out. He caught my eye and stopped, refusing to look away while we watched each other.

Finally the last elf left the workshop and we approached each other. The still air made me so nervous I thought I would burst, or at least . . . I think it was the still air.

"What's wrong?" he asked and I blushed.

"I just wanted to thank you." I muttered. He gave a half smile, one that made my entire chest cramp together and he shrugged, hair swinging over his face.

"It was no problem." he said back and I realized two things in that moment.

One, I was in love with Bernard.

Two, I could probably kiss his face if I stood on my tiptoes.

I froze up and hid behind my hair, fighting the urge to fulfill my feelings, to acknowledge my true intentions. Everything clicked into place and I stared at him. He was so gorgeous, so perfect. His huge brown eyes and his soft gentle smile. His protective stance and his stern attitude.

I was in love with everything.

"Kira?" he asked stepping forward. "What's wrong?" he took another step forward and I took a step back.

"Don't!" I shouted unintentionally. I couldn't be here. I was suffocating from my feelings, my realization. It hit me with full force. "You can't be around me!" I shouted and turned on the spot.

"Kira?" he called, confused, "What happened?" I turned back to him, my eyes wide with understanding.

"I-I'm sorry." I said from a safe distance. He rubbed his eyes.

"You have nothing to be sorry for." he snapped.

"I-I stopped talking to you." he grimaced.

"Yes, but I'm sure you had your reasons." he tried to be calm and stepped forward.

"I-I-I agreed to go to the dance with Curtis." I reminded taking a step back and he winced. I could see the anger build up in him.

"Well, I don't see why you should apologize for that!" he shouted. I could tell the blow was coming, I sense it was going to hurt before he said it, before he even thought it, I knew. "I don't care what you do with your life, Kira! I don't care at all!" The blow still hurt. More than when I fell, more than when I obtained my claustrophobia, more than when my mother told me I was probably not going to get into santa's workshop (she was depressed because her father died and quickly apologized to me) more than even when Melody insulted me.

This was hell.

I knew he regretted it the moment he said it. I could see it. But something shattered inside me. My chest burst with pain and the hurt shot to my eyes, threatening tears.

"Oh . . ." It was all I could do not to sob while I said it, "I have to go . . . get ready." I shivered with pain, breathing heavily. My world was crashing around me and I thought I was going to feint for a moment. I forced a smile at Bernard, the tears escaping and running down my face, leaving two wet drops on the floor.

I ran.

I was unconsolable.

The girls couldn't convince me to even come out of my room until Claire broke down the door.

"Kira, it's okay," Melody soothed, "there will be other boys."

"Yeah!" Ava encouraged. None like him. I thought bitterly, but she continued without noticing my disdain for their support. "Don't worry."

"Oh let her cry." Mina snorted, I silently thanked her, "I'd be bawling my eyes out if my true love shot me down like that." And the thanks was gone.

"She didn't love him." Melody whispered desperately.

Oh but I did, I thought, More than I knew was possible . . .

"Come on Kira, you have to at least go to the dance." Ava tried but I gave her a look saying, Oh no I don't! Melody seemed to read my mind as she sighed.

"Oh, yes you do . . ." we all turned to her and she grimaced, "You promised Curtis you would."

Curtis was going to pick me up at four.

It was two thirty when they forced me to get ready and I was shocked. How can one person go from being an absolute mess, and in two hours turn into . . . what I was? It was amazing. They put cucumbers over my eyes to stop the swelling while they worked on my hair and prepared my clothes. Surprisingly they didn't seem worried about their own appearances as much as mine, ignoring my protests that they get ready first.

"We need to work on you first."

"Yeah, trust me, Kira, you need much more work than us."

Admittedly I wasn't sure if I should have been insulted or flattered.

By three thirty the change was magnificent, though incomplete. My makeup had yet to be done, though the girls admitted not much was needed in that area. They readied themselves while I worked into my new dress and tried on my mask.

I was an entirely different person.

My hair was pulled into an odd ponytail, held up by a braid of my own hair. My eyes were visible for the first time in a long time, and my face was defined by the absence of my hair. The dress was a sleeveless, the skirt reached to the floor and had long pale snowflakes stitched into the design. The dress shimmered a beautiful blue and when folded it changed into a rich purple.

By the time the other's changed I decided I didn't want to have makeup.

The other's looked beautiful, though not as alien as I did. The twins wore opposing dresses. Mina's was gold and Ava's was silver, though they both had the same design. The dresses were togas, essentially, but the skirts were different, short in the front with a long trail in the back. They wore long boots up to the knees, their boots matching each other's dress. Their hair was tied in offset braids, Ava's on the left and Mina's on the right, and had velvet masks, the color of each other's dress. All in all they looked like mirror images of each other.

Melody wore a gorgeous white gown with musical notes adorning the hem and her jewelry. The top part of her hair was pulled into a braid and the rest of it was curled into wavy locks. Her makeup was faint pink and she smiled brightly. Her mask was also white with pink/gray musical notes creating the outline as it lined her face.

"How do I look?" she tease, giving a spin and I smiled.

"Beautiful, Melody." she giggled.

"Oh stop, I have a boyfriend!" she blushed madly and the twins giggled.

"You don't look half bad yourself, Kira." they teased and I looked at them. They handed me a mask. It had a red ruby butterfly in the center where you place the mask on your nose, and feathers creating the mask. The red gradually spread through the mask, turning purple then blue until it finally turned green on the tips of the end feathers where it touched my ears and I slid it on. I looked more beautiful than I ever thought possible. The girls even stared at the change, surprised by how well the mask looked.

"Oh my . . ." the twins whispered and just then there were two decisive knocks on the door.

KNOCK KNOCK

"That must be Curtis." I said and they grinned.

"We'll meet you there." they promised and I waved goodbye heading to the door. I touched the mirror as I passed it, making sure it was real, and grinned.

It was time.


	9. Dancing shoes

Curtis didn't recognize me at first. When I revealed myself to him he took a moment to catch his breath from the shock.

"You look positively breathtaking!" he joked as he hyperventilated. I rolled my eyes at him.

"Should we go, good sir?" I snorted and he beamed.

"After you my lady." I glanced back as we left the apartment; unsure I wanted to be alone with Curtis. I especially didn't want to think about-

I forced the thought from my mind and smiled. I was going to be confident and strong tonight, no matter what happened.

Caribou station is the place most elves go if they want to get somewhere fast, but Curtis and I took a shortcut though the park. We stopped by a small pond, the wind chilling but being an elf with magic I ignored it easily.

"Kira . . ." Curtis blushed as we slowed to a stop by the path.

"Yeah?" I called, turning to look at my escourt. He looked up at me and gave a nervous smile.

"I-I have something I need to confess." the world seemed to stop and I gaped at him. No way . . . I thought, horrified, you can't confess to me! I just realized I'm in love with . . . I swallowed my thoughts (not literally) and smiled as sweetly as I could.

"R-really? What is it?" I whispered and he gasped, as if in surprise, but spoke quickly.

"I only asked you to the dance to make Judy jelous!" he shouted and leaned over, eyes squeezed shut. There was silence for the longest time as I stared at him. I wasn't sure weather to be insulted or relieved.

Instead I started laughing.

Curtis opened his eyes and looked up at me, surprised and bewildered.

"Thank god!" I giggled, "I thought you were confessing to me!" Curtis drew back, then started laughing himself.

"No no no no no . . . I mean I would, if I wanted to like anyone it would be you," he said quickly as I began to silence myself, "But . . ." he trailed off and got that stupid smile on his face as he looked into the distance.

"It's Judy." I smiled back and he laughed.

"I'm glad you know how I feel." he smiled again and I shrugged, "I mean, you and Bernard must be alot like me and Judy." I would have admired the way he said her name if he hadn't brought up Bernard. I grimaced.

"Right . . ." I muttered and he looked at me, realizing what he had done.

"Oh! I'm sorry, I thought you . . ." he continued to blubber and I shrugged,

"It's not like that." I said more to myself than to him. We walked in that uncomfortable silence again, but it was much more relaxed than before.

At least we got that out of the way.

We took the Caribou to Valentine Palace and were astounded by the sights.

The entire palace had beautiful decorations and cupids flitting about. Doves and songbirds sang beautiful songs and the chill of the air was just cool enough for elves, but not as cool that the other's might not come. I stared at the place in awe. Even with my mask blocking my peripheral vision I was shocked by the enormity of the palace.

"First time being here?" came a voice from behind me and I swung. I thought it would be Curtis, teasing me, but instead I was faced with Jerry, the scum of the elves. He was looking me over with a girl on each arm and a smug look on his face. I was horrified that the girls were getting along so well.

"Yeah," I said and glanced at the girls, "What's with them?" I nodded and he laughed.

"They've come to an agreement." he smiled and they nodded, almost dumbly . . . like magic. My eyes widened and I stared at them.

"They've been bewitched . . ." I whispered and he cocked his head.

"What's your name girl?" he asked and I realized he either didn't remember me, or he didn't recognize me.

"That's no concern of yours, boy." I smirked and flipped my hair trotting next to Curtis.

"I don't like that guy," Curtis mumbled when I fell into step, "he makes me nervous." I glanced at him.

"I think he's bewitched those girls." I muttered and he gaped at me.

"You sure?" he called and I nodded.

"But I have no way to prove it." I whispered back. Curtis turned to glance but I grabbed his arm. "No!" I hissed, "He'll know you. You have to go to someone else. I can't let him find out who I am." I whispered furiously as I tugged him inside. "Go dance with Judy and get someone to tell the council."

"What about Bernard?" I froze for a moment, the whole idea of talking to Bernard after my realization made me feel terrified.

"C-could-could you t-tell him?" I whispered and Curtis stared at me.

"Woah! That's the first time you've stuttered tonight."

_It's the first time my heart has felt so aflutter . . . Oh my gingerbread I can't believe I just thought that._ Repressing the urge to slap myself in the face I headed over to the dance floor.

The cupids really outdid themselves with the ballroom. Chandeliers and ribbons and streamers were adorning the entire room and a beautiful balcony was on the far wall. Music was echoing across the floor and couples spun across it like water bugs. Cupids flitted through the air, giving cards roses and poems to elves and other creatures the things were sent to.

The crowd all turned to me. Despite my new practice I couldn't help but feel terrified to have everyone staring at me, but I pursued through. A smaller elf came up to me, she was the size of a human three year old, and she beamed at me.

"You're beautiful." she grinned. I squatted down to her height and looked her over. She had strawberry blonde hair and bright green eyes, she wore a beautiful pink dress with flowers stitched in the hem. Her ears were elf ears, and I smiled at her.

"You're beautiful too." I smiled. After that it was like i turned into a warthog carcass and everyone else was a lion.

Elves and other creatures asked me to dance, spinning me across the floor as the night went on. I danced with a least thirty or so creatures before I was finally spared from the tireless line of suiters.

I stood to the side of the dance. The twins were dancing with two elves who looked a little confused, almost as if Ava and Mina switched dates, and Melody was romantically dancing with Quinton. I smiled and waved at my friends and they all gave me weird looks.

What on earth are they-

"Would you care to dance?" came the harsh demanding voice from behind me. I leapt a foot into the air and turned to find Bernard, in a suit (no tie) standing before me. He had his arms folded behind his back and he still wore his signature hat, his dreadlocks hanging in his beautiful face. He wore a simple dark green mask and I stared at him.

Oh-

My-

God.

I smiled, my heart pounding in my chest like a woodpecker. I curtsied as smoothly as I could while he stared at me. I wasn't sure how to breathe anymore. I wasn't sure what he said, so instead I tried to think of something intelligent to say, seeing as my attempts to be bold and confident were failing.

"Hello." I smirked, the mask was helping my voice stay calm while my entire body started doing internal flips, "It's funny to see you in a suit, Bernard." I said, my voice sounded much older, like that of a more sophisticated elf. I finally felt right. Bernard didn't look surprised, but he stared at me with a strange intensity. Did he recognize me? I must admit, it did look strange for Bernard to be in a suit, but not funny. He was so attractive I was having a hard time resisting myself, and I already had a hard time with that in the workroom.

"Yes," he sighed looking down, "but the cupids wouldn't let me enter until I had something more proper on, and I had to come in for the council meeting." I looked around and he stepped closer. Our eyes met, maybe for the first time since when he was sick, and something clicked. My brain analyzed what he said and I smiled.

"Did you ask me to dance?" the corner of his mouth twitched and he stiffened.

"You could just say no." he snapped, starting to turn away. I put on hand on his shoulder and grabbed his arm, still smiling.

How could I stop? My stomach was filled with butterflies and rainbows and who knows what else because all it did was feel like I'd eaten unicorn.

"When did I say no?" I asked and seemed taken aback. For once I was the nervous one and he was the one who didn't know what to do. Our hands laced together and suddenly the lights turned off. Bernard wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me into his chest, I could tell he was looking around protectively.

Good god he was well toned. I pressed my face into his shirt, safety and serenity radiated off of him when spotlights flicked on and a slow romance song began. Bernard slackened his grip and I tore myself away. It felt like I was leaving home after being there for the first time in a long time. Bernard was smiling slightly.

"Let's hope we win the couples contest." He said, trying to remain serious. I leaned in, reminded of Melody's joke at lunch.

"Let's hope we make some memories." I said in his ear. He swallowed, hard, and turned away.

"Let's try to remain professional." He said sternly, but I could see his ear tips turning red.

"Now it's time," came the call of the cupids, "For the dance of the most romantic couples." There was an echo of cheers as the music started.

It was my favorite song- 'Perfect two' by Auburn.

Bernard readjusted his hands, careful of his placement as we situated ourselves. I forgot how to breath as we brushed. My heart was pounding and my face red, though the mask managed to hide it. Bernard wore a plain black mask on is face.

How I managed to keep myself so calm was beyond me.

We danced in silence.

It wasn't the uncomfortable awkward silence, but instead the calm relaxing silence.

Bernard and I stared at each other. My turquoise eyes entrapped by his brown. We glided across the dance floor like skaters on ice.

Not that I didn't want to talk. I had so many things I wanted to say but I just couldn't get them out. Eventually Bernard broke the silence.

"You're the girl from when I was sick." He stated it, almost as if he wasn't sure until now. I nodded.

"Yes." He paused for a moment while the affirmation rang though the air.

"Are you also the girl who sends me the cards?" I paused a little more for this answer.

"Yes." He didn't answer for a long time.

"Why haven't you come forward sooner?"

I stared at him. Sooner? What did he mean? Was I supposed to get to the dance sooner?

"Was this not soon enough?" I asked

_He doesn't know who you are._ The voice rang and I stared at him. He looked back, confused and indifferent.

I stared back, sadness and heartbreak once again going through my heart. _He doesn't love you or the girl you pretend to be, or anyone you are. He doesn't think anything of you at all. _My heart was breaking all over again.

I tore away from his grip. Refusing to look at his face and instead focused on his hands.

Calloused hands.

Safe hands.

I looked down and tears were once again falling. I was beautiful, gorgeous, enchanting. I was the most magnificent elf here.

"You don't recognize me?" I whispered and he frowned, now concerned. I stared at him a moment longer. "You have no idea who I am." It was a statement this time.

"I'm sorry." He said, not cold, but simple. Apologetic.

"I-I thought you would know. But I guess I wasn't really that . . ." I trailed off as his brow furred and his eyes stared me down. Most people would cry at this point, but I leaned forward and kissed his cheek. It was like a farewell to him.

Imagine if your heart was broken twice in one day.

Now imagine how it would feel to have your heart ripped out of your chest with a rusty spoon.

"I-I just thought-" realization crossed his face and I drew back.

Oh no.

I turned and strode across the dance floor. I will leave with my head held high, at the very least. At least he won't know. It will remain a secret.

"Wait!" he called and raced across the floor. A cupid watched us with excitement. I noticed Judy and Curtis dancing, noses touching as they grinned stupidly at each other.

"Adorable aren't they." Someone said. Swinging I came face to face with a cupid. Bernard was lost in the crowd, calling for me, but at the same time letting me get lost. The cupid smiled at me.

"You're Kira?" it asked and I nodded.

"Yes?"

"Ah . . . How interesting." The cupid circled me. He wore a suit and appeared to be examining the air around me.

"What is?"

"Well, your aura is something to behold." He said and smiled, "He's coming through now, and you might want to run." I turned to look at the crowd then back to the cupid, but he had vanished.

"Thanks." I said to the air.

I escaped out the door and tore off my mask. Snow was lightly falling throughout the Time to go home.

I closed my eyes and envisioned my house. The magic rushed through me and there was that strange tingling as my body started to vanish.

"Wait!" someone shouted and I turned just in time to see Bernard staring at me with wide eyes and a tired face. His mask was on the ground and he stretched out his hand. "Wai-" I vanished.

Oh god, what a day.


	10. Farewell

Naturally, the twins and Melody didn't come home until very late. And by very late I mean they came home early the next morning. I had changed out of my dress and pretended to be asleep. I didn't want to talk to them about the dance, and I certainly didn't want to talk to them about Bernard. They whispered and giggled furiously before Melody tucked me in and they left. I got up and watched movies until my shift started.

The whole day was a blur. I didn't bother sending Bernard a card. The twins were to exhausted to ask me anything about the night before, but not to busy to give me the basic layout of how the dance went.

It turns out Jerry hadn't bewitched the girls, he had simply convinced them to get along while he decided which he liked more.

Both were rejected and Jerry was flirting with another girl today.

I ran six runs when Santa came in. He looked the same, pretty much, except for the dark circles under his eyes. He smiled at Ava and Mina then turned to me.

"Kira, can I talk to you for a second?" The twins glanced at each other, realizing their mistake in gossip priority, but I followed Santa out of the shop before they could say anything.

"Kira, I'm a bit worried about you." He said, softly. Elves passed us, greeting Santa and ignoring me. It was back to the way things were now.

"Why?" I asked, my voice naturally soft.

"Well, you seem upset. And you haven't sent a card today. Did you forget to send Bernard the card or-"

"No." I interrupted, "I just stopped sending them because he met me last night, he didn't recognize me, and he found out I was the card writer." Santa frowned thoughtfully.

"So you're not going to send them because you, as in not really you but kind of you, were found out?"

"Pretty much." I said and started to turn away.

"Kira." He scolded and I turned back. "Bernard doesn't know it was really you. He's pretty upset and worried about you."

"Worried." I snorted, Santa glared, almost disappointed.

"Yes, worried, and don't take that tone. Why wouldn't he be worried?" I ignored the question, turning away.

"I don't want to send them anymore. He knows. There's no point in sending them anymore."

"But Kira-"

"Santa, I'm done with it!" I shouted, drawing the attention of other elves. They glanced at each other and started whispering. I bit my lip and tried to calm myself. "I'm done." I repeated, "I'm not going to send anymore." Santa watched me walk away; I could tell he was disappointed.

But I had been disappointed too.

The twins were like lions. As soon as I returned to the office they pounced on me.

"Oh my gosh Kira! We're so thick. How did it go with you-know-who last night!" Ava started leaning in. I glared at them both. How I would love to zap them to the Bahamas. I thought miserably but ignored them.

"Yeah, we saw you dancing! What happened?"

"Nothing." I muttered, unsure if I was lying. Mina took over now.

"Oh come on, Kira we saw you and Ber-"

"Enough!" I shouted. "I don't want to talk about it." I picked up the box and glared at them. "I don't want you two to follow me. Got it?" they looked like they wanted to protest but with me being their senior they ignored it and nodded. "Good. There is nothing between Bernard and me, there never was and there never will be. Okay?" Again they relented and nodded. "Good." I turned and trotted out when the alarm went off.

I was becoming more confident, that was true, but what was the price?

By lunch I had that absent feeling. It was like I had my way of breathing stolen, because I couldn't remember what I did during my lunch breaks before Bernard. I decided on sitting under the stairs next to the field. I trotted down the steps, swinging my knitted scarf over my shoulder I jumped the last four steps, nearly jumping into Curtis and Judy.

"Hey Kira!" They greeted simultaneously.

Don't groan don't groan don't groan . . .

I smiled; they were clutching each other's hands tightly and pressing against each other. Despite Curtis being much younger than Judy they looked perfect with each other.

"Hey Curtis, Judy." I nodded to each of them as they grinned.

"We were going to eat lunch at the upper tables. You wanna come?" Judy smiled. I shook my head, trying my hardest to remain polite.

"No thanks, I just wanna eat alone today. Headache." I clutched my forehead as if it had been bothering me. They nodded knowingly and waved goodbye.

Little did I know talking to those two sealed my fate.

Halfway through lunch the elves started playing tinsel football, like usual. I finished my honey bread and watched them. How could they be so carefree? I thought while I watched them. How could they just play like that? There was the crunch of snow and someone sat down across from me, but my eyes lingered on the players.

"I was looking for you." Came the familiar voice.

I swung to face Bernard. He was carrying two cups of hot chocolate. He looked tired and apologetic.

"Curtis told me where you were." He said, handing me the cup. He apologized without saying anything and I took it from him. Our hands brushed and I yanked the cup away somewhat violently.

"Any news on the cards?" I asked quietly, like I didn't know.

"I haven't got one today." He murmured. Neither of us drank, we simply took comfort in holding the hot cups. "But I met the girl last night." He suddenly said and looked up at me. "She was beautiful." My face grew hot. Maybe he suspects you. That strange obnoxious voice in the back of my head whispered.

"Really. That's good. Are you dating now?" I asked, trying to sound innocent.

"She ran away." Bernard muttered and took a drink of hot cocoa. I followed his lead and risked a glance at him. Our eyes connected as we took a drink and Bernard's eyes widened. I put my cup down and something shattered.

The other mug was broken and the next thing I knew Bernard had taken my face in his hands. The calluses rubbed against my cheeks uncomfortably but I was too terrified to notice.

"B-bernard . . ." I called, my voice stuttered for the first time in a long time. He released one hand and pushed my bangs out of my eyes. Once again our eyes connected and there was a spark that shot through the air. Bernard stared, our eyes linked through nothing.

I couldn't look away.

I couldn't stop staring at him.

Everything else was gone.

It was only us.

"It was you." He whispered and I realized exactly what had just happened.

Bernard had recognized me.

"It was you all along." He said and pulled away. I immediately felt the sting of his absense and reached out to him.

"No Bernard, you don't understand-"

"I don't understand?" he shouted and I whimpered, "You've been toying with me from the start! Pretending all of it! You were using those cards to get close to me!" his voice was harsh but not loud. The other elves didn't notice us, which wasn't surprising since the were to busy getting hit. "You even had the audacity to 'help'-" he spat the word out with disgust, "me with finding the person who sent me the cards." Another thing hit him, and he ran his fingers over his face. "That's why you didn't want to help me. That's why you talked so nicely about the sender." He gave a breathy laugh then glared at me. I was crying, hiding behind my hair.

"I'm sorry."

"Sorry?" he glared, "You're sorry? Do you have any idea what you did to me?" he asked and I whimpered again.

"I'm so sorry, Bernard." I whispered and he shook his head.

"I trusted you Kira." He said and I nodded.

"I'm so sorry." He stood there for another second then nodded again.

"Goodbye Kira."

I went back to work, fulfilling my run. Ava and Mina didn't want to talk to me after I snapped at them before break, but I knew they knew something was wrong. I decided to pack boxes while they did the run, trying to get them to increase their stamina before I did what I was about to do.

They were both gone when I wrote the last note:

I'm so sorry Bernard.

I didn't mean to hurt you. I tried to tell you many times about this but

I kept getting interrupted. I didn't want to tell you. I tried to tell you.

It wont be a problem anymore.

I'm sorry for the trouble,

Goodbye

An elf

I almost threw the card away but forced myself not to. Instead I wrapped it in an envelope and kissed it to make it seal. I wrote the second letter, this one addressed to Santa and sealed it. Then I tied them together and used magic to teleport them into Santa's office. Now that I had started using it again, magic came to me more easily. I sent the letter just as the twins came in.

"Girls," I said and they looked at me, wary and nervous. "Would you two be able to do a day of this on your own?" I asked and they glanced at each other.

"Did you and . . . Bernard . . ." his name made me wince but I didn't tell her to stop, "have a fight? Are you taking the day off tomorrow?"

"I might." I said and they glanced at each other. "Don't worry though. All this drama will be over soon." I gave them the happiest smile and they perked up.

"Oh my gosh! You have to tell us!"

"I'll tell you two when I come back." I smiled and they giggled.

"I can't believe it. I want to know now."

"Don't worry." I promised. "Anyways, I'm going to leave early. I'll see you girls!"

"Bye bye Kira!" they said and a voice came from the hallway.

"Kira wait!" it was Santa, but I pretended not to hear and disappeared.

Goodbye.

*Omniscient view (for the benefit of you guys)*

"Kira!" Santa shouted as he burst into the room. The twins turned to him and stared.

"She just left, what's up?"

"She left?" Santa exclaimed then rubbed his face. He didn't look rosy at the moment.

"What's wrong?" Ava asked, realizing something was wrong. Santa stared at the both of them for a moment before sighing.

"Kira sent me her resignation. She quit."

"What?" Both girls screeched, "What can you mean she quit? She just said she was going to be gone tomorrow." They spoke so in synch it was terrifying.

"Well, she's going to be gone a lot longer than that." He sighed and handed them the letter. They gaped at it then Mina choked back tears.

"Why?" Ava asked while she comforted her friend.

"I don't know. But she also sent this." He held up another card, the girls immediately recognized it for what it was. "I'm going to give it to Bernard now." He added. They nodded and he grimaced.

"Can you two handle this position alone?" They glanced at each other then nodded.

"We'll be fine. You just give that to Bernard." Santa left and the girls glanced at each other.

"So much for the O.T.P." Mina whispered, Ava grimaced.

"I guess we failed."

Santa knocked on the door solemnly.

"What?" the head elf snapped, inside he was scribbling furiously. Santa entered and stared at Bernard until he looked up. "Santa!" Bernard leapt to his feet. "Sorry, I was just working on paperwork. What?" Santa handed him the card. Bernard glared at it.

"I know it's Kira." He snapped and Santa frowned.

"Read it. Just this last one." Santa said and Bernard grimaced. They stared each other down before Bernard snatched the card out of Santa's hand.

"Fine." He snapped and tore open the card, "But you tell Kira that-" he broke off, staring at the card. He read through it twice and looked back up. "What's this?"

"Kira quit just a few minutes ago. That's her last card to you." Santa said. "I'm sorry." He turned and left Bernard alone.

More alone than he'd ever felt before.


	11. Reunited for the Separation

((Okay so this chapter is going to be weird . . . Brace yourselves.))

The lovely Kira has gone to live with her mother in an elf village in Northern Canada called Dor Aiglos (land of the icicles). It's now November 25th and Bernard has become increasingly more volatile. Santa has tried to get him to calm down, but since Kira left Bernard has become frustrated with the work of the elves. Today is the last straw, but the twins have been concocting a plan with Santa to get the two back together.

How will things go?

Oh, I almost forgot, there's one other character in all of this who is the most important, the most handsome, and the most awesome.

Me.

Jack Frost.

Have a good read.

*Santa's view*

I sighed at the tiny elf sniveling in my office.

"I didn't mean to-to mix up the mail, I just put one letter in the wrong bin." She whimpered. She was a tiny thing, with short black hair pulled into pigtails and bright blue eyes. In many ways she reminded me of . . . that elf. I shook my head.

It was too late for that now.

"I'm sure it was fine, Sophie." I tried to sooth. Mrs. Clause came in with a smile and sat down on the huge comfy couch.

"What's wrong?" she asked and I grimaced.

"Bernard." I said and she sighed.

"That elf . . ." she muttered and I smiled at Sophie.

"Don't worry, Soph, I'll take care of it."

"U-um . . . there's something else." She muttered, stuttering.

"What?"

"Mother Nature sent a message, a little while ago, I was going to bring it to you, but Bernard . . ." I groaned while Sophie spoke. "She's letting you know the meeting is going to happen here."

"Right, I know. Thanks." I sighed and she nodded, scurrying back, much slower than_ that elf_.

"What are we going to do about him?" I groaned and slumped into the couch beside my wife.

"I don't know. Make him go see her?" she suggested stroking my hair. Her belly was getting big now, but she still had a month to go.

"I can't just say 'Go see Kira, Bernard, you're heartbroken'. He'll just deny it and get even more temperamental. Even sending him fake cards didn't work."

"That's probably because your handwriting looks nothing like hers." She smiled. She was so beautiful, sometimes I didn't know how I lived without her.

"I know, but I'm at the end of my rope here." I said, exasperated.

"Well, I'm sure you'll figure it out, for the sake of the other elves."

"Other elves . . ." I trailed off closing my eyes. "Of course!" I jumped to my feet, beaming. The rosy came back to my cheeks and I smiled at my wife. "The twins!" I smiled and she laughed.

"You're going to ask the twins for advice?"

"They're the sneakiest elves around, of course I'm going to ask them for advice." She laughed.

"You know, I love how you didn't try to find someone else for Bernard. You actually care that they have something special." I smiled back and leaned down, kissing her gingerly.

"I think I care more than I should." I admitted and she smiled.

"That's why I love you." She beamed and I turned, going to fulfill my plot.

"Are we in trouble, Santa?" Ava asked. She looked a lot older since Mina and her had taken over the delivery branch. Kira never seemed to get older, she loved her job too much.

But then again, Bernard wasn't as . . . unpredictable back then.

"No girls you're not in trouble." I smiled and sat behind my desk. They both visibly relaxed.

"What's up, big guy?" Mina smiled, leaning back. I rubbed my eyes.

"This is going to sound insane." I admitted and they grinned at each other.

"We specialize in the insane." They said simultaneously. I laughed.

"I see, well, I need you're advice." They looked shocked and glanced at each other, I continued, "Bernard is a bit out of control, and I bet we all know why." They nodded with grim conviction.

"Kira." They said.

"Right, I need my head elf back, the one who was productive and not terrifying to the other elves. Any suggestions?" they pursed their lips, still in synch, and beamed.

"We've been doing nothing other than think of suggestions for months." Ava said as they grinned.

"Perfect!" I sighed. Mina stood.

"Well, you best get comfortable. This might get complicated."

An hour of listening to plots we finally decided on one, though it was not my favorite the others seemed a bit extreme. They left my office in an excited rush. Luckily it was break time so they didn't need to worry about delivery, but I feared if they were even the slightest bit late. The twins were often pressed the most because of their link to Kira.

"Bye Santa, Good luck with the plan!" they smiled and skipped off, whistling happily. It was somewhat rare for there to be whistling in the workshop, as it was hard to be happy, but the feeling spread and soon other elves were smiling.

I hunted down Bernard to initiate stage one, finding him yelling at an elf for a somewhat pointless reason.

The perfect initiator.

Sighing I pulled him away from the elves.

"Bernard, you need to cool it. It's not necessary for you to be so hard on them." I scolded and he glared.

"They have to learn, Santa." He snapped and I glared back.

"Now cool it, we aren't so far behind for Christmas that you have to yell at every little thing." I tried but I knew he wouldn't relent.

"Santa even if we aren't behind we can't slack off." I sighed as he turned to walk away.

"Bernard you leave me no choice." Bernard frowned as he turned to look at me.

"What?" he sounded a bit fearful but not so much so that he looked the part.

"Bernard, I'm going to have to put you on vacation suspension for one month." I scolded and he gaped.

"You can't be serious, Calvin!" he shouted and I grimaced.

"Bernard, you're just being to strict on the elves. How are they supposed to work when you're putting this much pressure on them."

"Just because I was lax at the beginning of the year doesn't mean-"

"You weren't lax, Bernard, you were reasonable. What are you even yelling at this elf about." Bernard looked towards the elf.

"He's been in charge of feeding the reindeer. He fed them too much." Bernard admitted.

"Doing it once isn't that bad." Santa sighed and Bernard grimaced.

"But if he does it one he'll do it again and then they wont be able to fly because they'll be to fat and-"

"Bernard, I understand you're nervous about Christmas being a month away, but so help me I will fire you if you don't take a vacation this next month." Bernard threw his arms out in frustration.

"Where am I even supposed to go?" he demanded and I shrugged.

"I hear there's a great festival going on in Dor Aiglos, or there's a-"

"How close is Dor Aiglos?" he asked and I shrugged.

"Pretty close. Maybe half an hour on Blitzen." (Blitzen was the fastest) Bernard rolled his eyes.

"Santa, I have magic. I'll be back the moment it turns midnight on Christmas." He said and I laughed.

"I'm sure you will Berno, but you have to leave this moment." He nodded then frowned.

"Who will be in charge?" he asked.

"Curtis." I replied, Bernard grimaced. "He's perfectly capable to function without you."

"But-"

"Ten second or I'm going to fire you Bernard."

"Santa, I mean it, call me if anything goes wrong."

"Five seconds." I warned.

"I'm going I'm going." He snorted and disappeared.

Just like Kira.

((see, it's been pretty weird, but keep your hat on, soon it will get a little less weird))

*Kira's view* ((told you))

My mother ran an inn in Dor Aiglos. It was the best inn in the whole world, but of course, not many knew that. I helped her run it with my two brothers and their wives. Dad, of course, couldn't help us. Sometimes I wonder what mom felt like when he died, then I remember what it was like at the workshop and wondered if she understood my pain.

She was extremely disappointed in me, of course. I had quit from the most perfect job for all elves ever, and I had quit willingly. She always looked at me and gave one of those sighs that said 'what am I going to do with you?' before she got back to whatever it was she was doing.

"Kira!" she called from the kitchen one morning. It was the end of November and the town was just starting to get prepared for the festival on Christmas Eve.

"Yeah?" I called back. I had been cleaning a room while my brothers and mom prepared the food.

"Can you man the desk? I have a feeling someone will be coming." She said and I sighed. Sometimes my mother's magic let her know if a guest was coming and who would be best to let them in. I sighed and trotted downstairs. I trotted to the desk but tripped at the last second and knocked off the cup of pencils, spilling them everywhere. I groaned and knelt behind the desk. The bell rang and I sighed.

"Just give me a second." I called as I scooped up the pencils.

"No hurry." Came the sharp familiar voice. I froze under the desk, the pencils clacked in my hand.

No. Oh god no . . .

I closed my eyes and stood, my back to him.

Don't be there. I wished and turned opening my eyes. I came faced to face with Bernard. My hair had been trimmed, but my bangs were able to be tucked behind my ears, and were at the moment.

"Hi, Bernard." I said and he stared. Our eyes locked onto each other and I felt like hugging him and never letting go. My heart started pounding and I looked down.

I knew I couldn't.

Not after what happened.

"Kira." He whispered. We just stared at each other for the longest time. I grimaced and broke the silence.

"I'll get someone else to get you checked in." I breathed and turned but he caught my arm.

"It's fine." He said, turning away from me. "I'll leave." He shot me one last glare.

"Good to see you!" I called desperately. He froze and sighed looking over his shoulder.

"Fine." He sighed and walked back over. "Check me in." I wrote down his name and occupation before sliding it over.

"Please sign here." I offered the pen while pointing at a box and he brushed my fingers while he slid the pen out. I tried to remain calm but when he offered me the pen I couldn't help but redo the action.

I brushed his fingers back and he pursed his lips while I signed the registry, showing I had checked him in.

"My key?" I handed over the tiny metal object, dropping it in his hand. "Where's my room?"

"Um, you have room seven so it's up the stairs and the fourth door on your right. The stairs are through that doorway on the left. There's a bathroom and a queen-sized bed, but we offer meals down here. The dinning room is through the doorway to the right." I gestured to the doorway. "There's also a phone in your room if you want to call anyone. There's a button for room service if you need it." Bernard nodded before heading through the doorway. He paused for a moment but didn't look back.

"It's good to see you, too, Kira."

I didn't see Bernard for the rest of his stay.

I knew it was over.

*Back to Santa's view* ((told you it was weird, don't worry, it gets better.))

**Christmas eve**

Another problem. I rubbed my head as I slumped into a chair. I don't know why I told the council I would have Jack here. It's already bad news that he was trying to overthrow me by freezing a volcano and I had to send Bernard on vacation, and that I sent him to the town Kira was in . . . I rubbed my head, annoyed.

And lets not forget Carol's parents are here with my family, and they all think I'm completely incompetent. Plus Curtis can't control anything. I wandered out to the town and leaned against the railing of the fake Canadian village. There were elves, but not here, they were all too busy to be in the street.

"There you are, Scott." Jack said and I glanced at him uneasily. His white hair and bright smile made him seem so innocent, but I think I should have known better.

"What do you want Jack?" I sighed and he leaned against the rail with me.

"I wanted to give you something." He handed me a box not much bigger than a snow globe.

"What's this?"

"It's a Christmas present. I was going to give it to you tomorrow but with everything going on I thought you'd like it now."

"I can't right now Jack." I sighed.

"Come on!" he smiled, "It'll make you feel better." He handed me the package again and I huffed.

"Fine."

"You know, right about now I bet you wish you had never been Santa at all." Jack said and I looked at him while I subconsciously tore open the package.  
"Well, yeah I guess." I muttered. Carol hated me, my elves were miserable; we might not even go through with Christmas this year. Why wouldn't I want to stop being Santa? I didn't even have my two best elves. "I really do wish I'd never been Santa." I said as I pulled out the package, but I was looking at Jack.

"At all?" he asked innocently and I rolled the weird round object around in my hands.

"Yeah, Jack. I wish I'd never been Santa at all. You happy?" I glanced at him but he was staring at my hands. I looked down to see my snow globe.

I had just invoked the escape clause.

"I am now." He smiled and hugged me, the chill of his body engulfing me as I watched my life rewind.

Suddenly we were in front of my old house. I saw Santa up on the roof and Jack darted forward.

"No!" I hissed and tackled him. We brawled, hitting each other a few times but I prevailed. I ran towards the house passing a snowman, I was going to-

**_CLANG_**

"Oh god! You hit me with a shovel!" I glared at him but he was at the bottom of the house.

"Hey you!" he shouted and Santa fell.

No! I struggled to get up but Jack was picking up the coat. I ran towards him trying desperately not to let him put on the coat.

"Stop!" I shouted but he smiled and swung the coat over his shoulders.

It was over.

I lost.

((Again I swear it's not over, the next part will be so cool . . . Sorry Jack.))


	12. Fragmented Past

I was in a weird pent house. What the hell was I doing here? Suddenly a strange guy walked in.

"Okay, Calvin, sales are through the roof. We still have some work to do tonight but I'm sure we can . . ." he trailed off seeing my confused face. "Hey you okay?"

"I-I'm fine. What day is it?"

"Uh, the twenty forth?" It's Christmas ever?" he shook his head like I had asked a stupid question and started working on a weird phone thing.

"We're working on Christmas eve?" I frowned and he raised his eyebrows.

"Of course. Sometimes you make us work on Christmas too."

"I do?" I drew back and shook my head. "No." Swinging my coat around my shoulder I turned to the assistant.

"Go home! I'm going to see my family!"

"You mean your ex wife and son?"

"Yes."

"You remember where they live?" he frowned but I didn't answer and left.

I knocked on the door desperately and Laura opened it.

"Charlie, I told you not to-" her voice cut off when she saw me. She appeared to have aged twenty years and her hair was disheveled.

"Scott." She snapped. Charlie came running down the stairs, looking like he was going somewhere.

"Oh." He glared and I frowned.

"Hi guys." I muttered. Why were they looking at me like that?

"What are you doing here?" Laura asked, crossing her arms in annoyance. I stared at her. I know I used to love her, and seeing her this mad at me made me so sad.

"I just wanted to spend time with you two." I said, why was that so unbelievable?

"Dan's here now. Bye mom." Charlie said pushing past me.

"Charlie wait! I told you not to go!" She reached towards him and he spared her a glance.

"Charlie, listen to your mother!" I ordered and he sneered at me.

"Yeah, since when have you ever cared?" he snorted and ran off.

"Go away, Scott." Laura sighed.

"Wait, where's Neal and Lucy?"

"Neal? Really?" she laughed, "Don't you remember? Are you drunk?"

"No, I just . . . I'm having a rough night."

"You are drunk." She scoffed and shook her head, "Neal and me got divorced."

"What? Why?" I gaped and she pursed her lips.

"He tried to replace you as Charlie's father, but Charlie only wanted you." We sat there in silence for a moment longer and I sighed.

"Can you tell me where I can find him and Lucy?" I frowned and she stared at me.

"There in the same place they go ever year, the North Pole."

"What?" Everything was spinning. My entire world was crashing around me and she nodded handing me a pamphlet. The North Pole was publicized as a weird resort. There were pictures of Jack and elves all singing and dancing. "Good god he ruined Christmas." I glared. It took every ounce of my strength not to tear the pamphlet into pieces.

"Great, thanks Laura." She began to close the door when I remembered the most important question.

"Wait, one more thing!" I called and she paused, barely holding the door open anymore.

"What?"

"Where's Carol? My wife?" she frowned.

"You're married?"

"Carol Newman?"

"You married Charlie's old principle?" she screeched in horror, "She's probably terrorizing some students."

"We never married?" I whispered and Laura shook her head in disgust.

"Good, because that would have broken Charlie's heart, if it wasn't already." Then she slammed the door in my face.

Now that I knew what Jack had done and what had become of the world I felt sick. I had allowed myself to fall into doubt for just a moment and Jack had almost won. But I wasn't giving up just yet. I booked the first flight out to the North Pole. I had to see Neal and Lucy, not to mention the elves.

I entered the pole with my guard up, but as soon as I did I felt horrified. Spoiled children screamed at their parents that they wanted something, the elves were being used as mascots and one could take a picture with them. I searched the crowd for anyone I knew and heard a familiar voice.

"Come on, Dad, we don't want to miss the show." I turned just in time to come face to face with Neal and Lucy.

"Hey, Neal." I greeted. We all looked at each other and he nodded.

"Scott." I smiled in a pathetic attempt to lighten the mood.

"You're still wearing those sweaters I see." I nodded and he grimaced.

"Yeah," he sighed, like the very thing made him tired. "What are you doing here Scott?" he frowned.

"Oh, you know, just seeing the sights. Running my own toy company makes competition very suspicious." I muttered and he gave a halfhearted laugh.

"Okay, let's go Lucy." He snorted and

"Bye Uncle Scott." Lucy said and trotted off. I watched them leave and nodded, disappointed. How could I have just given up on that life?

I started following Lucy and Neal to whatever 'show' they were talking about when Curtis suddenly stepped in front of me.

"Hello there sir, may I interest you in some North pole, paraphernalia?" he offered me a series of things, including a pen.

"Curtis?" I asked and he looked briefly surprised.

"Very good sir. Would you like this pen, it can record brief clips of voice such as-" he clicked the pen twice and held it close to his mouth, "Have a holly Jolly Christmas!" he clicked the pen again and it played the clip.

"Curtis don't you remember me?" I demanded and he shrugged.

"Have you been here before sir?"

"I . . ." I trailed off, realizing that no one knew what I knew and sighed. "I'll take a pen."

Curtis handed over the pen when I spotted Frost. I glared at him and shoved my way through the crowd.

"You tricked me Frost!" I shouted as I approached. He looked up and smiled.

"Ah! Scott! I was wondering when you were going to arrive." He smiled, "Have you been enjoying your life?" he asked and I glared at him.

"You tricked me into saying that! You tricked me to become Santa Claus." I growled and he waved the security men away. I frowned at the little elf by his side. She looked mature, but was a tiny thing. She looked up, turquoise eyes flashing and she gaped at me.

"Santa?" she whispered and Jack frowned.

"Go get ready for the show, Kira." He ordered but she hesitated.

"How-"

"Kira!" Jack snapped and she looked toward him.

"Right, yes Ja . . . Santa." She gave a little bow before running off.

"That's Kira?" I gaped and he smiled. His toothy smile was almost sick.

"Gorgeous isn't she. You know I didn't know she existed until I became Santa. She's got quite the singing voice too. You should stay for the show. It'll be going on in a few minutes." He smiled and I ground my teeth.

"You're using Kira as arm candy?"

"Not quite. She's my main attraction really. Too bad she's so clever." He sighed.

"You tricked me Frost." I glared.

"Oh come on, I didn't force you to say 'I wish I'd never been Santa Claus at all'. I mean who said that? Rudolf? Rudolf's mama?" He taunted and leaned back. I forced myself not to smile in triumph. I clicked the pen twice again to stop the recording but pressed on.

"You're just too cruel. You sell spots on the nice list and anyone else gets coal?" I grabbed the coat but he simply smiled.

"I recall you gave up all rights to decide those things. Guards!" They yanked me off of him and he straightened himself. "Take my friend Scott here to the show and make sure he gets a good seat." He sneered and I glared at him.

"I'll fix this, Jack."

"Oh I'm sure." He chortled as they dragged me away. I was placed in the middle of the back row. I glared at them and made myself comfortable. Someone sat beside me and I looked, coming face to face with new Kira. She was wearing really bad Christmas clothing with a thick hat and scarf.

"Kira!" I whispered and she smiled.

"Hi there Santa." She greeted and I frowned.

"How do you know I'm Santa?" I whispered and she sighed.

"To be honest I don't know. There are three possibilities. One, you introduce me to my true love, two, you influence me to change the fate of the world, or three a random series of circumstances which just randomly picked me to remember the world as it was, or any combination of those." She said thoughtfully.

"What are you doing here?" I demanded, "Why are you working for Jack? You seem so much more confident now. Why don't you quit?" She looked at me with pity.

"Unfortunately I am the main attraction, Jack will do anything to keep me here. He's threatening my sister, Melody. Most elves stay here simply because this used to be the best place to get a job for our kind. Melody is the head worker of the reindeer. She makes sure they don't do anything . . . disrupting. If I were to quit or try to quit he would make her life hell." She sighed.

"So you're stuck as his . . . what are you?"

"You remember the Mrs. Clause? Eight years. It's been twelve years Scott. Who do you think he married?" She whispered. I gave her a pitying look.

"That's horrible." I gasped in horror but she only shrugged.

"Other elves have it worse. Anyways, I wanted to talk with you about the other Christmas." She pressed and I nodded.

"Yes, about that. Where is Bernard? He's my head elf." She gaped at me.

"Bernard was like me. When Jack came home all those years ago instead of the other Santa, that is to say you, Bernard knew something was wrong. He used his magic to fight Jack, but . . ." she trailed off.

"He lost?" I asked and she nodded solemnly.

"But he put up a good fight. So good Jack locked him up in an anti-magic cell." She shook her head. "No one had the courage to fight him after that, it's another reason there are so many of us still here."

"Well in the other Christmas I think that's why you two remember. I kind of introduced you two." Her eyes widened and she gaped at me.

"You mean Bernard might be my soul mate?" she hissed and I shrugged.

"I don't know. But that would explain a lot." I said and she nodded.

"It would explain some of the fragments of memories I have as well. What's other me and other Bernard's relationship status right now?" she asked and I grimaced.

"Not good. It's complicated but basically you two still haven't gone out yet." She sighed.

"That would explain the fragments of memory, if that is the reason we remember. But anyways I wanted you to give my other self a message."

"What?"

"When you get back." She insisted and I gave her a disbelieving smile.

"Kira, don't even know if I will get back."

"You have to!" she snapped and I recoiled. "Sorry, but you really do. And I have to tell the other me an important message."

"But I have so many questions. What show?"

"You'll see it in a minute but seriously. I don't know if I could talk to you after this." I nodded and gestured for her to continue. She blushed like old Kira and looked down. "Tell me to go after what I want. I remember how unsatisfied I was just running around the shop and I just . . . I know how empty it felt. Tell her not to let life pass her by and to go after what she feels is right. She'll be a lot happier if she does." Music started and she swore. "I have to go. Good luck Santa." She stood up and stripped off the crappy clothes and revealed a beautiful outfit and makeup. Some of the children screamed with joy at her appearance and some of the boys reached out to her. She ignored them and ran up the stairs onto the stage.

"I love you Kira!" Lucy shouted and I gaped. Kira looked at Lucy and smiled, the kind sweet smile she used to have. Lucy squealed and shifted in her seat excitedly.

I think I just solved how to get things back to normal.

I scooted forward to Lucy and tapped her shoulder.

"Uncle Scott?" she asked and I smiled.

"Hi Lucy, I'll bet I know something about you that no one else does . . . "

((I'm going to skip the part where Santa gets Lucy to get Jack's snow globe and teleports back to the real time line because I'm assuming you've all seen the third movie and I want to get on with my fan fic. Thank you!))


	13. Lucky Number 13

((Okay things will finally return to normal now.))

*Kira's view*

It was Christmas Eve. 11:54pm.

The day Bernard was to leave.

I went to his room in hopes of settling the tension between us. Knocking on the door quietly and there was a loud sigh.

"Yes?" he called and I pried open the door a tiny bit.

"Bernard? It's Kira." I called and a long silence followed. "I wanted to talk before you leave." At first I thought he was going to ignore me. I was waiting for what seemed like hours before starting to ease the door shut but a faint.

"Fine, come on in." made me sigh with relief. I opened the door just enough to slip into the room before shutting it behind me.

"What do you want?" he called and I spotted him at the writing desk in the corner. He looked exhausted, like being away from work was killing him, and he was reading what looked like a letter. Piles of the same kind of letters littered the floor around him and he looked up at me.

"What?" he demanded. Even though he wasn't glaring at me the hostility in his voice made me wince. I bit my lip and cleared my throat before catching his eye.

"I think we need to talk." I said, quiet but stern. He chewed his cheek before nodding.

"Fine. Sit down." he waved his hand, the letters fluttering into a box and it slid under the bed as I sat on it.

"What are those?" I asked but he didn't answer. He readjusted his chair so we were facing each other and raised his eyebrows.

"What?" I grimaced and looked down, trying to think of the proper words.

"Bernard . . ." I started finally, "I didn't ever intend to lie to you. I never even wanted to get that involved with you about the cards." I said and he sighed looked anywhere but at me. "I just . . . I wanted you to know how much you meant to not just me, but every elf there."  
"Oh, and lying to me was the best way to do that?" he glared, "I'm sorry, I must have misunderstood your intentions when you started working on that with me and you just forgot to mention you were the one sending them to me all along." His voice rose as he spoke and his eyes locked with mine before he turned away.

"I tried to tell you, many times. Remember when we were in your office and Curtis burst in talking about the sabotaged toys?"

"We never found out who that was." Bernard muttered subconsciously.

"Well I tried to tell you then." I insisted and he allowed me a glance.

"Why didn't you tell me all the times we had lunch? Or at the dance?"  
"Bernard, I used to stutter out of nervousness whenever I spoke to anyone, how did you expect me to tell you something that important?" he shook his head.

"There were plenty of opportunities." He sighed.

11:58pm.

"Bernard, please."

"What will you have me do?" he demanded, "Say, I forgive you? Tell you it's all right? Even if I did that what good would it do? You quit, remember? You couldn't come back." He stood and glanced at the clock.

11:59pm.

"I trusted you Kira. We were close. You were closer to me than anyone." He admitted, his ear tips turning red. "We were friends. A luxury I haven't had in a long time." He said.

"I'm sorry Bernard." I whispered and he shook his head.

"It's too late Kira." He said and I nodded.

"Okay."

"Goodbye." He said and the clock turned to midnight. He disappeared like he had never been there.

It was over.

Santa didn't start with our village. Most of the time he ended the night with Dor Aiglos so I didn't wait up for him.

I didn't want to anyways. After Bernard left it was like my energy was completely sapped. I opened the window, letting snow fall in through it while I lay in bed. I ignored the blankets, preferring the cold as I collapsed on my bed.

But I didn't sleep. I felt my body slow down, it was like gravity increased four times and I was crushed into my bed. I had no idea what to do now. Whimpering I closed my eyes and tried to forget about my life.

That's when the sleigh bells came.

I opened my eyes and sighed.

"Not now." I groaned and sat up. My body didn't agree and increased the gravity. My body could hardly move but I forced myself to stand and go down to the tree.

It was a habit of all elves. I couldn't miss a chance to see Santa after I heard those bells.

I got downstairs and stood by the tree in our living room. A huge fireplace sat by the tree along with a glace of milk in a thermos and a heated plate of cookies. Seeing as my family lived in the hotel we had a tree in the lobby and one in our living room behind all the other hotel rooms.

There was a strange sound from above and I slumped in the chair yawning. The rest of my family must have fallen asleep because none of them were down here.

Santa emerged from the fireplace and looked around frantically.

"Kira!" he whispered and ran up to me. He grabbed my arms and kneeled, as if he couldn't believe I was there. He touched my face with a gloved hand and nodded, smiling.

"Hey Santa?" I asked, trying to lean away, "What's going on?"

"Oh, well . . . Kira, I need to tell you something." He sighed and grimaced.

"Don't you have to get back to the North Pole to give the elves presents?" she asked. Not many people knew it but Santa gave the elves presents after he delivered the toys.

The only exception would be if Santa didn't come back.

"I needed to stop here. I rushed so I could make it. Kira listen, this is going to sound Crazy but you have to believe me." He looked desperate and I knew Santa wouldn't lie to me.

"I will." I promised. He nodded but he didn't look relieved.

"Kira, do you know about the Escape Clause?" I hadn't. "Well, it's another clause in the Santa contract. If I wish to stop being Santa I could take my snow globe from the hall of snow globes put my hands on it and wish I'd never been Santa at all and everything I did as Santa would be undone." I raised my eyebrows.

"What?"

"I know. Anyways Jack Frost came to the North Pole for one of Mother Nature's meetings and he caused so much chaos I felt like I wanted to say that then he tricked me into holding my snow globe."  
"So basically you undid your Santa career?" I whispered and I nodded.

"Don't worry I fixed it, if it wasn't obvious, but not before I was teleported to a future where Jack had turned the North Pole into an amusement park." I drew back in horror and he nodded taking a drink of the milk.

"Your family always knows just how to put the milk." He smiled and I shrugged.

"We've been doing it for so long I'd hope we'd know."

"Anyways, I met you there. Well, not you, you but another you."

"I understand."

"Anyways she wanted me to give you a message."

"What?" I scoffed, "Just me?"

"You were one of the only elves I met. I also saw Curtis and the twins were in that ghastly show . . . but that's not the point. You remembered me."

"Wha-That's impossible."

"Not apparently. Anyways, she wanted me to tell you something."

"What?" Santa took a deep breath and looked away.

"She wanted to tell you to follow what you feel is right." I snorted a little and he shook his head.

"You don't get it, that Kira was miserable, she was forced to do horrible things and she never got to do anything without permission. She was the most tortured elf there."

"What does that have to do with me?"

"Are you going to wait forever for something to sweep you off your feet when you know exactly what will make you happy?" he grimaced and I frowned.

"But I don't know what I want."

"Oh really?" he asked standing up straight and I shrugged. "You mean you didn't just realize your feelings for a certain elf?" I blushed hard and looked away. "And you didn't just see him?"

"It's too late though. I can't go back to the North Pole I quit." Santa laughed and shook his head.

"Kira, you were the best thing that ever happened to the North Pole. I'd welcome you back tonight. Just come with me on the sleigh." I licked my lips.

"I don't know."

"Come on. Hasn't there been something you've been dying to do? And haven't you regretted leaving ever since you did?" I looked up and him and quickly looked down. "I'll take a few minutes to unpack the present for your family, after all your older brother has a child on the way." Santa smiled and I looked up at him.

"Wow really? I thought he wouldn't have enough magic for that."

"They were saving up to make sure." Santa smiled. I nodded and thought. Santa started to unload his bag.

I was pretty miserable.

I did regret it.

And even if I was rejected, at least I would get my job back.

I loved that job. I chewed my lip as the thoughts shot through my head. Santa straightened up and smiled. There wasn't anything for me under the tree. The thing I wanted most wasn't a thing at all.

It was a who.

"Well," he asked as he got into the fireplace, the last cookie in his hand, "what will it be, Kira?" I looked up at him nervously and smiled.

"Okay." I said, "Take me back."

The sleigh ride was nerve wracking. What would I do? I knew I wasn't the most courageous person ever but I had to do something. I thought about it as Santa glanced at me.

"Eat something." He insisted and pressed the CD button. Hot cocoa poured into the reindeer mug and a cookie popped out of the dispenser.

"Okay." I murmured and took the cookie, nibbling on it nervously.

"What are you thinking about?" Santa asked and I looked up at him.

"What happens next." I said and he smiled.

"Well, we're almost there." I inhaled and snatched the mug gulping down the scalding liquid. "Kira," Santa smiled, "Don't be nervous. Just do whatever feels right." I bit into the cookie and nodded.

"I think I know what to do now." I said more to myself than to him and we landed on the platform.

"Here we go." The reindeer ran off and the ice lowered beneath us, I looked down and saw the town then the workshop. I leaned over the edge, searching the crowd for Bernard.

Any sign.

I spotted him looking up, but he wasn't really paying attention, he was off in his own space and started striding through the crowd of tiny elves who were all giggling and pointing up. We got very close to the ground when I heard it.

"Is that Kira?"

"Kira's back?"

"What?"

"Kira?" I leapt off the sleigh and onto the ground with a loud thud. Bernard was climbing up the stairs to get an over view of the scene. I raced after him. The crowd seemed to part before me and I saw the twins.

"Go get him Kira!" they called and I skipped the stairs three at a time. Bernard was halfway up.

"Bernard!" I called and he turned. I jumped the last couple of stairs, my arms outstretched and Bernard cocked his head a little as I enclosed the space between us.

_Here it goes._ I thought.

_Do what feels right_. Santa's words echoed through my head and I smiled. His arms automatically circled my waist as mine wrapped around his neck.

Time slowed.

His eyes locked with mine.

My breath caught in my throat.

I leaned in.

I kissed him.

The moment our lips connected it was like fire works went off. My heart was probably leaping out of my chest. My arms tightened and our noses touched in the depth of our kiss.

Bernard and I pulled away from each other, but he didn't let go.

"Hi." I whispered and he smiled. I smiled back, wishing my mouth was bigger. I hadn't smiled for a very long time. I felt like I could fly.

"Hi." He whispered back and cheers erupted from the elves. We looked out at the crowd, everyone was cheering and clapping. Some were jumping up and down; the twins were hugging each other and screaming. I blushed and started to let go but Bernard tightened.

"Let them look. I've wanted to do this for a long time." He slacked his grip and turned me into a deep bow thing before kissing me again.

I didn't think it was possible to explode from happiness, but that moment made me feel like I was going to.

The elves 'oohed' in giddiness but nobody cared. I think, for that moment, the world was perfect.


	14. Return of the Elf

After our little scene Bernard brought me back to his office, struggling through the crowd of elves as they giggled and whispered about us. I blushed as I stumbled into his office while he locked the door.

"God, those elves love a good story." He snorted and ran a hand through his hair, "They just wont leave you alone." He muttered and replaced his hat on his head. He glanced at me, smiled and took two steps forward, crashing his lips into mine. My hands automatically circled his neck and his hugged me closer. I could feel his heartbeat racing as we kissed and one of his hands raised up to run through my hair.

I felt so happy I couldn't pull away until I needed to breath and I tore away, gasping. We both inhaled awkwardly, still within kissing distance as we panted. I looked up into his eyes, blushing like crazy. Bernard was also blushing but it also looked like he was keeping his cool.

"Bernard . . ." I whispered and he leaned in to kiss me again but I looked down shyly. Having all this kissing was making me nervous and embarrassed. "Bernard we need to talk about this before it goes any farther." I said and grimaced as he nodded.

"I agree." He said and straightened up. His hands lingered on my waist before he leaned back propping himself up on his desk. "We have to make a few things clear." I took a chair in front of him and stared at my shoes.

"Bernard," I started and at the same time he said-

"Kira," We both stared at each other then started to babble incoherently before returning to silence.

"You go first." He finally ordered and I nodded, clearing my throat.

"Um, about the cards . . ." I started and he looked away in shame.

"What about them?" he more growled than said. I blushed and looked down at my hands.

"I can understand if you can't forgive me for that, but I can't stay here if you don't. I'll have to go back to my mom's hotel and-"

"No." he ordered and I drew back in surprise.

"Wha-"

"Kira, Santa was right." Bernard sighed, "I was miserable without you here. I couldn't help but see little flashes of you in everyone. It made me so . . . frustrated-Not because I was mad at you!" he added quickly when I started to look away in shame, "I was mad at myself for letting you go."

"What about all that stuff at the hotel?" I asked and he sighed looking down.

"When I saw you again I didn't know what to do. I couldn't even think of what to say and I just wanted to leave and think of something. When you called out to me I couldn't leave so I ended up just staying and trying to think of something to say to you."

"But I went to talk to you and you just . . ." I whimpered a little and he looked down. He leaned back and opened a drawer in his desk, pulling out a box.

"That's what you were looking at in your room." I said stupidly. It was a beautifully carved wooden box with white snowflakes appearing to drift down the sides. He handed it to me, a whisper of a smile on his face.

"Open it." He said and I peeled the cover off.

Inside were all of my little notes and letters.

Every single note I wrote to him and every single card. They looked worn, like he had gone through them every night I was gone and they were filed neatly by date. I pulled out the top one and recognized my final card. The corner of it was wrinkled, like water had been spilt on it.

"I thought, when you didn't come talk to me, and because you kept avoiding me, you were still mad. I ended up just staying in my room and trying to find a way to make you forgive me." He sighed and pulled out one of the cards. It was the one from when I was sick. I giggled and he raised an eyebrow at me.

"I thought it was the other way around." I laughed and he smiled.

"Kira, I know I was in the wrong. I never needed to forgive you." I smiled back and stood up, coming dangerously close to his face.

"I never needed to forgive you either." I said and touched my nose to his. We were both blushing like crazy and he suddenly started laughing. It was the most magnificent sound in the world I started to laugh as well, eyes closing from the force of it. Soon we were just sitting there, noses touching, as we laughed, happy to have the company of one another.

As we slowed to a stop I opened my eyes to find Bernard's calm collective brown eyes staring into mine.

"Kira, I had something else I wanted to talk to you about." He admitted and I raised my eyebrows, still smiling.

"Hm?" I asked and he reached down, grabbing my hands comfortably. We linked our fingers and I was surprised that they fit perfectly.

"Well, seeing as we both like each other mutually . . ." he started, blush spreading over his face, "Would that count as us . . . would that mean that we . . ." he cleared his throat as I stared at him.

I think I realized what he was trying to say, but I wanted him to say it.

"What I'm trying to say is," he said, now more frustrated and blushing like crazy, "Would you go out with me sometime?" it was more of a statement than a question but it didn't stop me from grinning like a mad person and snogging Bernard full on the mouth.

We stayed like that for a long moment before I pulled away, smiling wider than before.

"Of course." He sighed with relief and leaned in, kissing me harder than before. Soon it became a tangle of limbs and I pulled away for a moment, hooking my fingers around my sweater and throwing it off before returning to Bernard. The heat was powerful and I hugged closer to him. It felt so right to be here I hooked my fingers on my under shirt while Bernard fumbled to get his sash off when-

**KNOCK~KNOCK~KNOCK**

Suddenly there was a loud rap on the door and we jerked away from each other. I gawked at the floor uncomfortably. My sweater lay in a heap and I blushed like crazy as I dove for it.

"Bernard!" Santa called and Bernard pretended I wasn't here with him and opened the door a crack while I scrambled to put on my discarded clothing.

"Yes?" he asked and Santa barged past him just as I slid my sweater back on, hugging it close.

"Ah, I'm glad you and Kira are back together. You two really made a scene." We both blushed and Bernard swallowed, hard.

"I was just getting the paper work for her old job." Bernard muttered, not meeting Santa's eyes.

"Good!" Santa smiled and winked at me. "Glad to have you back, Kira." He smiled and turned strutting out.

"Have fun you two. But don't forget, we have Christmas in 365 days!" he smiled and I blushed.

"What are you insinuating, Calvin?" Bernard growled and Santa chortled as he exited the door.

"Nothing, Bernard, nothing at all."

Bernard slammed the door after Santa, re-locking it for good measure.

"That nosy old . . ." he glanced at me as I stared at the floor, arms wrapped around my chest tightly. "I suppose we should actually do the paper work." He muttered thoughtfully. "Kira? Are you okay?" I looked up at him, into his eyes, blushed and looked away.

"I-I'm f-f-f-f-fine." I stuttered and he smiled, sliding down the couch to sit next to me.

"I missed that." He whispered and I jumped, unsure of what to do.

_I almost just did 'it' with Bernard._ I thought in surprise. _The act._ I blushed and looked at the floor as Bernard waved his hand and a sheet of paper appeared in front of me.

"Seeing as we know you're qualified and all that I'll just have you fill out this application and you can start back up right away." He said and I nodded, mute. I couldn't look at him in the face without feeling embarrassed.

"Kira . . ." he whispered, "About what just happened . . ." he reached over and touched my shoulder and I stood abruptly walking to the other side of the table.

"I-it's f-fine." I mumbled and looked over the paperwork. It was basically the same sheet as when I applied to go here.

**Seven hundred years ago**

_"So, Kira Thotae," Kalen, the old head elf, asked. He had really thick curly hair and nearly black eyes, "You would like to work in the delivery department?" he asked and I nodded, trying my best to smile. "You do realize, of course," he continued, "That it is one of our least popular departments and has the highest rating of dissatisfaction in the whole Workshop?" Again I nodded, this time adding a little-_

_"Y-yes Sir." As I struggled with my stutter._

_"Okay. Can you tell me why you would like to join the department?" he asked, preparing his pencil and pad. I cleared my throat and looked nervously around the room._

_"W-well, the way I s-see it." I said, focusing on his pencil nervously, "while everyone aspires to-to make the ch-ch-ch-children of the world happy, I want to be the bridge to –g-get there. An elf c-can't make toys without suppli-ies and if I can get those to them I-I am becoming both the joy the elves feel and the happiness the children feel." Kalen nodded as he wrote I chewed my lip._

_"Okay. I can see your mother was in the department as the head elf. Your father was the head of the inventive department. Do you aspire to become the head of the department or simply to get into the department?" he asked and I looked at my feet._

_"F-for now my g-goal is to get in and do my j-job well. After that I might aspire for greater things, b-but I'm not sure if it's what I want yet." I said, my voice shaking when it didn't stutter._

_"You seem nervous, Kira." Kalen said and I tried to smile._

_"I-I am not very good with as-associating c-consciously with elves, s-so I would like to do so unc-consciously." I added and he nodded. _

_"I think that's enough. I will contact you in a few days to let you know if you got in." he said and led me out the door. _

_ I went home and cried until I got the call I had gotten in._

_ The very same year, Kalen retired and Bernard took over._

I filled out the form and handed it over to Bernard. He took it and it vanished and he leaned back on his desk.

"Kira . . ." he mumbled and I stood.

"I guess I better get to work." I said approaching the door. Bernard appeared in front of me and I immediately looked at my shoes.

"Kira, we need to talk about what just happened." He said, holding the door closed with one hand. I chewed my lip and shrugged.

"Nothing happened." I pointed out and he frowned.

"Yet." He frowned and I blushed, "We have to be careful about what we do, if we have that kind of reaction just from kissing." He said and I nodded, still not looking up. I was too embarrassed to actually look at him.

"Kira," he growled, annoyed with me. "Would you look at me please?" I glanced up, blushed and looked back down.

"I-I get it." I whispered. "We have t-to be c-careful."

"Kira!" he snapped and I winced looking up through my curtain of hair. He sighed and brushed my bangs out of my face, keeping one of his hands on my jaw to make sure I didn't turn away. "I want to be with you." He said and I blushed looking down.

"I want to be with you too." I replied and I could tell he was repressing a smile.

"How about we go on a date?" he blurted, voice cracking, and I snapped my eyes forward.

"Wha-what?!" I exclaimed and he smirked.

"It'll be fun. Dinner, a movie, ice skating. Whatever you want." He smiled and I gaped at him.

"Wha-really?" I asked and he nodded.

"Yeah. How about tonight? Eight thirty sound like a good time for me to pick you up?" he asked and I blushed.

"You m-mean . . . we'll be g-going out t-t-t-together?" I whispered and he smirked.

"Of course. If that's okay." He added and I nodded, vigorously.

"But don't you have to watch over the night shift?" I asked and he sighed.

"I knew all the elves thought I slept here." He muttered annoyed, "Curtis and Roy watch over the night shift. I do have a house outside of the workshop. It's admittedly not much but I do go sleep there for a few hours every night." He grimaced.

"Oh." I whispered, embarrassed.

"It's fine. I do spend a lot of time here." He replied. More awkward silence followed and I smiled, kissing his cheek.

"I'd love to go on a d-d-date. Maybe we could go ice skating for a little bit then eat dinner." I suggested and he nodded.

"Alright. I'll pick you up at eight thirty." He said and opened the door for me. Outside were about twenty elves, all pressed to the door that jumped away as the door opened. They smiled sheepishly; among them were the twins and my sister.

"Ah," I blushed and smiled at Bernard. "Okay." I whispered and he sighed.

"Aren't you all supposed to be working?" he snapped.

"Aren't you?" someone from the crowd shot back and they all giggled. Bernard glared into the crowd.

"Let me make this clear, just because I'm going to be dating Kira-" I squeaked and blushed, shrinking with embarrassment, "Doesn't mean I wont be as strict with you as I was before." He glowered.

"Then what does it mean?" the same person called and he ground his teeth.

"It means you should all get back to work before I fire the lot of you!" he shouted and they scattered. I blushed and stared at my feet.

"I'll see you tonight, Kira." Bernard sighed and leaned over, kissing my cheek lightly. I beamed and turned to join the crowd. Bernard returned to his office and closed the door while I ran back to the delivery department.

"Hello Kira." The twins greeted darkly. I gluped and tried to smile.

"Hi girls. What's up?" they didn't stop smirking evilly at me and pulled me in.

"You owe us the juicy details." Ava grinned,

"Yeah," Mina smirked, "You promised to tell us once you got back." The alarm rang and I grinned.

"Wow, look, a delivery. I'll run it." I smiled and picked up the boxes, surprised by how light they seemed to me.

"We'll come with you." They grinned, "Talk while you run." I gulped and sighed.

"Fine, but you can't interrupt." I scolded as we turned to walk out the door. They grinned at each other and turned back to me.

"We would never . . ."

And off we went.


	15. Rusty in Love

Once the twins got back to the shop we had to do a second run, which I ended up only being able to do half of until I became so exhausted I nearly collapsed.

"Seriously, girl, you have the strength, where'd the energy go?" Ava teased. I shrugged, unable to speak and they snickered.

"Well you just rest up so you can do the next run, and tell us what happened exactly."

"As long as . . . you two explain . . . what happened with . . . Jerry." I panted and they glanced at each other and sighed. There was still time before the next run so Mina pulled up a chair and sat down next to me.

"We should probably tell you now." They said and Ava started packing up the boxes while Mina and I sat.

"Jerry was the only elf apparently happy you were gone. Every time Bernard got angry with him and annoyed at the other elves, Jerry would immediately become overjoyed and start whistling or dancing. It was like he enjoyed seeing Bernard in pain." Mina said and I raised my eyebrows.

"It was weird." Ava added, "It was almost like he was only doing his job to stay around Bernard to watch him in pain.

"That doesn't . . . make any sense!" I wheezed and they nodded.

"We know." They said simultaneously.

"We did some digging to try and see what was going on and . . . you wont like it." Ava said glancing at Mina.

"It turns out Jerry is-"

"None of your concern." A sharp voice came behind us and I turned to see Maggie, the dressmaker.

"What?" I frowned.

"What are you doing here?" Ava snapped and Maggie raised her eyebrows.

"I work here now, in the clothing department." She said coolly and I cocked my head in confusion.

"What do you mean Jerry is none of our concern."

"Well the twins can gossip all they want, but Jerry is none of YOUR concern, Kira." Maggie smiled. "I just came here to ask for some extra lace, I'm making a new design so hopefully kids will like getting clothes for Christmas." She said holding out her hand and Ava looked over.

"I'll see what we can do and bring it to your station next run, okay Mag."

"It's Maggie!" she snapped and flipped her red hair. "And don't worry about Jerry, Kira. He's not a problem for you." She smiled and stutted off, seeming pleased at her disruption and I glanced at the twins.

"What's Jerry?"

"He's Bernard's little brother." Mina blurted, "He's been trying to sabotage Bernard's job ever since he became head elf. You see when Jerry-"

"Hold on!" I interrupted, holding up my hands. "His _brother_? As in . . . a sibling?" I gaped and they nodded.

"Jerry and Bernard both applied for positions here, and they both got hired. They promised each other they would aspire to become the head elf, only Bernard reached the position before Jerry and he did such a good job at it . . ." they paused and shrugged, "he hasn't left since. Jerry on the other hand, after a humiliating defeat from his brother was shamed and humiliated."

"Apparently, ten years after Bernard got into the position they had a falling out of sorts, but we couldn't find out what it was." Ava input and Mina gave her a glanced before continuing.

"Anyways after that-here's the really weird part-"

"Jerry being Bernard's brother wasn't the really weird part?" I asked and Ava laughed but Mina remained quiet.

"It was _a_ really weird part, this is more of a 'you need to know but don't want to know' really weird part."

"Ah."

"So, Santa noticed Bernard was acting really upset back then, because his brother and him stopped talking, and so he kinda, sorta, maybe, actually set him up with an elf in fashions-"

"As in to go out with her." Ava interrupted and Mina shot her a glare, but stopped when she caught wind of my expression. I must have looked like I swallowed a bug.

"You wont believe it Kira, but Bernard had a girlfriend before you. Santa set it up so Bernard would have to go to the dance and he made a girl meet him at the dance and flirt with him and . . . it was Maggie."

Now I have nothing to hold against Maggie, really, I mean other than her not listening to me in the dress shop and her being a complete ice shard when we were talking I really had no opinion of Maggie, high or low.

But after hearing she was Bernard's ex girlfriend . . . I really didn't ever want to see her again. What if Bernard still had feelings for her? What made them break up? I felt sick and put my head between my legs, panting and gagging.

I never felt so dependent on one elf before, but I really had no way of coping. What do people do when their possibly true love might have gone out with someone else? And what do they do when that person comes back to work at the same place? I closed my eyes, head spinning and stomach churning.

"Kira?" Ava asked, as if from afar. "Are you goanna be okay? We have a run to do and we have to go."

"I'll be fine." I said, almost inaudibly, but they seemed to have heard because they gave me a pat on the head and left. I sat up and gave them a halfhearted smile but I couldn't keep it once they left. I returned to my position with my head between my legs and started shaking, violently. Maybe it wasn't so bad. They must have broken up for one reason or another. There was the sound of a door opening and someone sat next to me as I wretched. A hand started rubbing my back and I glanced over to find Melody smiling at me. I sat up to face her and hugged her, grinning.

"I forgot how much I missed you!" I beamed, releasing her after a good polar bear hug.

"I thought you might need me." She said and I noticed she was smiling widely.

"Hey, Mel." I smiled back, "What's up? You and Quinton still going strong?" I asked and she nodded shyly, looking away and blushing.

"Not as strong as you and Bernard, though." She teased and I gave a short laugh before feeling like I was going to puke again.

"Ugh." I snorted and she rubbed my back again.

"Actually, I have some good news. Great news actually, for me at least." She said, sounding giddy. I sat up again to listen, forcing my stomach to remain still. "I got into the Reindeer crew!" she squealed excitedly and I gave a loud gasp.

"That's wonderful news! Fantastic!" I hugged her again, "When?"

"Actually, just when you got back. I took the test again about a week ago and I just heard the letter today I'd get to be on the team!" she smiled like there was no tomorrow and I squealed for her.

"That's amazing!"

"It might have been because Curtis was in charge while I was taking the test though-"

"Or because you're great with the reindeer or you're meant to be on that crew or because Quinton was helping you train or a dozen other reasons." I interrupted, "Don't sell yourself short just because it took you some time. You weren't ready until now to go into that, and I'm sure you'll do great."

"Really?"

"Yeah. You know Mel, I think you come to me when I'm feeling bad because you're feeling bad yourself." I smiled and she bit her lip looking around as though she were nervous though I could see the smile playing on her lips.

"Maybe." She teased and I shook my head with laughter.

"Always the comedian." I jeered and got up, feeling much better. "Thanks, Melody. I really wasn't feeling myself." I smiled and she laughed.

"What are sister's for?" she shrugged and gave me another hug before turning to leave.

"And another thing, Claire kinda sorta gave me your room." Melody said, looking down in shame. I raised my eyebrows. "I don't really have the sort of money or time it would take to move, so-"

"Don't worry about it." I shrugged, "I'll find someplace else." She gave me a look that made me think she was unsure about that but I smiled. "Really, it's fine. I can survive on my own. I can buy a new place, just let me stay over there for tonight. Okay?" she nodded, still looking unsure, but left without another word.

8:00

There was another layer of fresh snow on the ground, and most people were going out on dates as celebration to another successful Christmas. There were Christmas parties and the entire city was lit up like a firework.

I stood in the doorway of my old apartment, a few suitcases in hand and I gawked.

The whole place looked different. She had painted the walls so there was a crisp scent in the air to go along with her huge Christmas tree in the living room. The apartment was a one bedroom flat complete with kitchen bathroom and closet to go along with the long entrance hall and the big bedroom. The whole place still smelled of fresh bread and I smiled.

"It's great, Mel." I said, my voice choked up and I turned away as if to observe more.

"Um, I can set up the couch for you to sleep on." She said and I nodded.

"That'd be good. But what I really need is help getting ready." I smiled and she raised her eyebrows.

"For what?" she frowned then her eyes widened, as if she read my mind. "You have a date with Bernard?" she gaped, voice slowly rising in pitch as she asked the question.

"Y-yeah." I affirmed and she grinned, eyes lighting up like a firefly.

"Well then I guess we need to call in backup."

"I don't know if we'll have time." I muttered, "He's picking me up in a half hour."

"Well, then we better get started now." Melody said and she took my suitcases, opening them on the cocoa table and shuffling through my clothes. "Ah, here." She handed me my old favorite dress I used to wear to every Christmas party. It was a simple purple dress that had a crescent moon tailored on the skirt. She handed me a pair of grey stockings and some long elf boots to go with them.

"Um, you know w-we're going i-ice skating, right?" I stuttered, blushing at the thought.

"Ah! Right, you'll need ice skates." She said and ran into another room. I changed while I waited for her and looked under the Christmas tree. An unopened present marked 'Kira' sat there.

"Oh! I forgot I got you something for Christmas." She laughed and picked up the gift. "I kept thinking you'd come back every day, so I wanted to have something ready for you when you did. I started working on it before you left." She smiled and handed me the present, some ice skates tucked under her arm. "Open it. It is Christmas, after all." She smiled and I carefully pealed off the package.

After two layers of tissue paper I found a black leather bound book. On the front of the book was a plastic window, where there was a picture of Bernard and me dancing. He was looking at me like he couldn't believe I was real, and I was looking at him like I had to be somewhere but didn't want to go.

"Look inside." Melody instructed and I looked up briefly.

"Hm? Oh!" I said and peeled open the front cover.

Inside were dozens of pictures of Bernard and me. There was a picture of me running boxes across the floor, and a small photo of when we were drinking hot chocolate. There was a snapshot of the time I had gotten scared under the sleigh and hugged Bernard for comfort while he glared around the floor protectively, and when Bernard had been leading me to his office with an angry expression on his face while I trailed behind with our hands intertwined.

I didn't realize I was crying until one of my tears hit the pages.

"Kira!" Melody cried and I held up a hand.

"I love it." I muttered and looked up at her, my face hurt from the grin. "It's perfect." She gave me a soft kind of smirk and rolled her eyes.

"You have a date you silly girl." She snorted and I gasped whipping my eyes.

"Right. I-I don't know what to do, what will I d-d-do? Are-are you sure this is-is enough? Where are we going? W-what do I say?" I started to blather and twist my hair.

"Kira!" Melody snapped, laughing a little. She strode over to me and grabbed my hands gently. "You'll be fine. Have fun and be yourself. He wouldn't have asked you out if he didn't like you." She reminded and started to smooth my hair. "I'll make sure you look great, okay?" she giggled and I nodded vigorously. "Good." She smirked and started to lead me into the bathroom. "Then let's get started."


	16. Silent Date

8:32

Four quick decisive raps on the door of our apartment and I glanced at Melody nervously. What do I do? I wanted to say, but my voice had left me. My stomach fluttered.

"Hurry up and answer it you dolt." She pushed and grinned, "I'll be right here." I mouthed 'thank you' as best I could and pried open the door two inches. Bernard wasn't looking at the door, his face turned off in the distance, and he had his hands on his hips, frustrated. He was wearing a big brown coat and a red scarf with a simple pattern on it. I squeaked and closed the door again.

"What are you doing?" Melody hissed, "Open the door!" she ordered and I started to babble incoherently. "Kira, look at me!" she glared. "If you make me open that door I **will** hit on your boyfriend." She threatened, but it didn't quite work. At the word 'boyfriend' I froze up and nearly fell to the floor. Melody caught me and I whimpered. "Son of a Snowflake, Kira!" she murmured. "Just open the door, for frostbite's sake!" I managed to stand, and Melody forced me near the door, even put my hand on the doorknob. I glanced at her and she glared.

"So help me I will shoot you in the face if you don't open that door in the next three seconds. 3 . . . 2 . . . 1 . . ."

I threw open the door and Bernard was standing there, hand halfway through his hair and the other holding his hat. I froze, arm sideways and the other hanging at my side. We stood there and stared at each other for a minute. Then five minutes.

I held up a trembling finger.

_One sec._ I mouthed and he nodded slightly.

I grabbed the door to close again when Melody caught it with her arm and glared at the two of us.

"You two are impossible." She cried and glared. "Bernard, Kira, seriously." She shouted and shoved me into the hall. Bernard unfroze and caught me in his arms and she slammed and locked the door behind us.

"And don't come back until you've gone to dinner!" she shouted through the door and mumbled to herself angrily. I clung to Bernard's coat as if for dear life and when he moved I jumped away and stared at my feet.

"Kira." He said, softly and I looked up at him. He held out his hand. I hesitated for a moment before taking firmly. As we started down the stairs he suddenly started laughing and I broke into a fit of giggles. We didn't say anything until we got outside and he pulled me to walk next to him.

"Would she really have shot you in the face?" he laughed and I shrugged.

"Maybe. She-she was pretty angry." I replied and looked up at him. He was only about five inches (twelve centimeters) taller than me, but I couldn't help feeling so small next to him. He glanced down at me and I blushed, managing not to turn away. He gave me a smile then squeezed my hand.

"So ice skating first?" he asked and I nodded, noticing Melody must have put the ice skates over my shoulder when she shoved me out the door. Bernard smirked and leaned over to give me a quick peck on the lips. When he pulled away my eyes must have been as wide as saucers and my face the colour of a tomato, because had to choke back his laughter.

"So cute . . ." he snickered and I let out a squeak. He laughed and shook his head. "Kira, I have no idea what I'm supposed to do with you." He said and I looked down, squeezing his hand tighter. "You make me want to kiss you even when you don't say anything." He said and I looked up at him, eyes wide. His face was red but he was still smiling.

"Y-y-you t-too." I muttered and he glanced at me, eyes wide. I tried to smile, but I couldn't keep his gaze and had to turn away.

"You've said a total of six words this whole time and your already driving me to insanity." He laughed. I didn't reply because I couldn't even think of any words.

We approached what looked like an empty pond. The ice was like glass and snow gently drifted over the clear frozen water. Tree's lined the sides and a bench sat on the edge. He led me over to the bench while I admired the view. Despite the snow the whole pond was shimmering from the reflection of the moon.

"Here we are." He said and turned to give him a grin.

"H-how did-did y-you find this pl-place?" I stuttered and he smiled looking out over the pond.

"My parents used to take me and my brother to ice skate here." He said softly, his eyes going out of focus. "We called it 'Moon pond' because no matter what time of year it is, this pond is always frozen and always reflects the moonlight." He said and stood, ice skates already on his feet. I raised my eyebrows and he gave a mischievous smile. "The perks of magic. I have to make sure I never loose practice." He said and I nodded looking at my own skates.

_Go on._ I thought and they tightened and tied themselves. Bernard laughed and held out his hand.

"I guess I'm not the only one." He said and I took his hand, pulling myself to my feet, tripping over my own skates. Bernard stumbled a little when we got going and I laughed.

"I thought you ice skated a lot?" I teased and he smiled.

"Not for a long time. I'm pretty rusty." He replied then tugged my hand so I stopped. Turning to face him I cocked my head. "You didn't stutter." He said.

"I-I guess I'm getting used t-to the-the butterflies I get in m-my stomach every t-time I t-talk to y-y-you." I stuttered, blushing and he gaped. His surprised expression quickly turned into a repressed smile.

"And I'm not the only one who's stumbling." He said pointing at my feet, which were set far away from each other.

"I-I haven't gone ice-ice skating since . . ." I trailed off, shuddering at the memory. Bernard looked worried but pulled me closer as we started to ice skate again.

"Let's play a game." He declared and I frowned, confused.

"G-game?"

"Yeah." He snapped, though I don't think it was meant to sound as harsh as he did, "I ask you a question and you have to answer honestly, then you ask me and I have to be honest. If you don't want to be honest then you have say 'reverse' and the other elf will give you a dare, which you have to do!" he said and gave me a purposeful look and leaned in so we were only an inch away from each other. I exhaled and a puff of mist rose between us. "No matter what." He added, refusing to relent and I looked away.

"O-okay." I mumbled, "You f-first." He looked up at the sky, snow melting before it hit his face and I blushed.

_He's so attractive . . ._ I thought, then let out a choke gasp and he glanced at me.

"What?" I waved my hand to say it was nothing and he sighed.

"Alright . . . what's your favorite food?" he asked and I giggled.

"Th-that's your first quest-tion?"

"Yeah, and you have to answer." He teased smiling. I don't remember ever seeing Bernard smile like he was now.

"R-right." I muttered and stretched. "Warm bread and honey." I replied and he raised his eyebrows.

"Interesting." He said before almost tripping and falling. I giggled a little and shook my head.

"W-what is your favorite song?" I asked and he looked up again.

"It's pretty embarrassing." He sighed, "But 'Have I Told You Lately That I Love You'." He said quietly.

"Really?" I asked and he raised his other hand, the one that I wasn't squeezing the life out of and gave me a look of innocence.

"Honestly, even before the dance." He swore and I nodded looking down. "Alright, my turn." he started, "How did you get claustrophobic?" he asked and I raised my eyebrows. I didn't want to explain that. It was the worst memory I had, excluding when Bernard yelled at me, but that was all in the past now. I grimaced and looked at our hands.

"When I was little, my father used to take my sisters and me ice skating." I said, voice steady but soft, "when we went last, Melody fell into the ice with my father. Being her older sister I felt responsible and jumped in after them, knowing I could protect myself with magic, I created a bubble around myself and tried to follow her. When I reached Melody, my dad had fallen out of sight. I pulled my sister into the bubble, but something was wrong. She was so cold, so I compressed the bubble, knowing it'd make the temperature rise. When it did I started getting scared so I tried to go down to get my dad, but I couldn't see him. It was so dark and the further I went the darker it got and the more magic I used and the more scared I got. I finally reached him when my magic started to run out. I saw him open his eyes just in time to seem me turn and float back to the surface. He looked so . . . scared." I managed not to stutter while telling the story and Bernard squeezed my hand for comfort.

"I'm sorry." He whispered and I shrugged.

"I am too. If I had just lasted a little longer, if it hadn't been so dark, if I hadn't been so scared, maybe I could have saved him." I whispered and he gave me a weak smile.

"You did all you could. You saved your sister." He reminded and I shrugged.

"I guess." We skated in silence and Bernard turned suddenly, so he was skating backwards in front of me.

"Ask me a question, any question and I'll answer it." He said and I looked up at him.

"W-why did you and your b-brother, Jerry, start fighting like you do?" I asked and he scowled then laughed darkly.

"You really know how to pick your questions." He grumbled and rubbed his head. "But I suppose I'm not one to talk." He grimaced and spun back around so we were back to skating side by side. "Jerry and I were always competitive, just not so much so that we fought that much." He sighed and shrugged. "When we both got hired to the workshop we started a competition to who could make it to the position of head elf the fastest. Obviously, I made it." He sighed, "I only won, though, because Jerry took the blame for a mistake he didn't make. He always blamed me for setting him up- I didn't-" Bernard added when I gave him a sideways look. "He just always blamed me for it. The head elf was considering taking us both on as apprentices and seeing who was the better elf, but when that mistake came to light, Jerry was kicked out and I was instantly promoted." He sighed, "Jerry then turned our parents against me and has tried to make my life summer ever since." Bernard sighed and we stopped at the bench, refusing to make eye contact.

"Fun game." I mumbled and he laughed.

"Alright, my turn." he said and sighed. "What's the funniest memory you have?" he smirked, trying to lighten the mood. Just as he said it his skate went over a ridge in the ice and his feet flew out from under him. There was a loud 'fwomph' and my arm was wretched as Bernard's hand slipped from mine.

"Bernard!" I shouted, reaching towards the ice, but he just sat there, hands at his sides while he winced in pain.

"What?" he snorted and I covered my mouth with my hands, choking back laughter. "What?" he demanded, now trying to stand.

"Th-that certainly makes it to the t-top ten." I giggled and slowly a smile broke out over his face.

"Oh does it?" he smirked and I giggled, nodding. "Well is it so funny now?" he asked and lunged forward on the ice, arms encircling my legs.

"Eep!" I yelped and slumped onto the ice with him. "Bernard!" I whined, still giggling. He laughed and rolled over so he was facing me, head propped up on his arm.

"It's your turn." He said and I looked up at the sky.

"Why do you like me?" I asked and he laughed shaking his head.

"Is that a serious question, Kira?" he laughed and I glanced at him.

"Y-yeah. I mean . . . I-I'm not very pretty, o-or very brave." I muttered, "And I have a really bad personality. I basically tricked you into liking me." I pointed out and he frowned.

"What are you saying? That I don't really like you? That's nonsense."  
"Well, I'm saying that there are plenty of girls out there better than me." I snapped and he sighed.

"Kira, as far as I know, there isn't a girl more amazing than you in any way." He turned to look at me but I couldn't look him in the eye. I was sure I'd start crying. There was a very cold silence about the air, and the moon hid behind a batch of clouds.

"I couldn't just name one thing." Bernard said suddenly. I frowned and glanced over, but he wasn't looking at me. He was lying on his back, eyes staring at the clouds and his far hand on his chest. "There are too many things I like about you to actually list them all." He murmured, and suddenly something was brushing my hip.

I looked down just in time to see Bernard's hand encircle my wrist.

"I was trying to find your hand." He muttered and I smiled. I hadn't realized I missed the absence of his hand until his fingers weaved through mine and he tightened his grip around my fingers again. We lapsed into silence, though I don't think either of us minded.

We lay there simply enjoying the sound of each other's breathing.


End file.
